"If pumpkins grew on trees!" joke
One warm day, Mulla Nasruddin was taking it easy in the shade of a walnut tree. After a time, he started eyeing speculatively, the huge pumpkins rising on vines and the small walnuts growing on a majestic tree.
Sometimes I just can't understand the ways of God! He mused. Just fancy letting tiny walnuts grow on so majestic a tree and huge pumpkins on the delicate vines!
Just then a walnut snapped off and cut down smack on Mulla Nasruddin's hairless head. He got up at once and lifting up his hands and face to heavens in supplication, said:
Oh, my God! Forgive my inquiring your ways! You are all-wise. Where would I have been now, if pumpkins grew on trees!
One day a man from Alabama comes to Georgia to get an education. He goes to the first professor he sees and says, “What can you teach me?”
Shocked, the professor answers, “Well, I can teach you about the power of reasoning.”
With a questioned look on more...
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A: 45 lbs.
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Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!