"Gujarath" joke

Hot 5 years ago

A Patel family in Gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother arrived from the US. It was sent by one of their daughters. The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it.
When they opened the lid, they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters:
Dear Chandrakantbhai, Arvindbhai, Mohan and Varsha:
I am sending Ba's body to you, since it was her last wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our ancestral home in GUJARAT. Sorry,
I could not come along as all of my paid leave is consumed.
You will find inside the coffin, under Ba's body, 12 cans of cheese,
10 packets of Toblerone chocolates and 8 packets of Badam. Please divide these among all of you.
On Ba's feet you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan.
There are also 2 pairs of shoes for Radha's and Lakshmi's sons. Hope the sizes are correct.
Ba is wearing 6 American T-shirts. The large size is for Mohan. Just distribute the rest among yourselves.
The 2 new Jeans that Ba's is wearing are for the boys.
The Swiss watch that Reema wanted is on Ba's left wrist.
Shanta masi, Ba is wearing the necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take them off her.
The 6 white cotton socks that Ba is wearing must be divided among my nephews.
Please distribute all these fairly.
Love
Smita Patel
PS: If you need anything else please let me know soon, Bapuji is also not feeling too well nowadays.
SOME PEOPLE ARE WISE, OTHERS

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There was once a Gujarati living in USA called Raju Patel, who was involved in a car accident. At the hospital, when he awoke, he called for the nurse to tell him what had happened to him.
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A Patel walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He says he is going to Europe on business for two weeks andneeds to borrow $5, 000.
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DEAR WIFE

I'm writing this letter to you to tell you that I'm leaving you.

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This is a compilation of actual student GCSE answers.
1. Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in
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Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants
have to live more...

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