"Gordon Ramsay" joke
Bruce comes home from the pub and sees Sheila watching Gordon Ramsay's F%*#ing cooking show on the telly.
Bruce says; "What are you watching that shit for? You can't cook to save your life!."
To which Sheila replies; "So what? You watch porn movies, don’t you?"
Your momma is so fat when she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck half way down.
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!