"Good Old Days" joke

If you were born between 1940 and 1950, this is for you!. ... If not, pass it on to someone who was.: )) We were born before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, xerox, contact lenses, frisbees and the PILL. We were born before radar, credit cards, split atoms, laser beams and ball-point pens. .. before pantyhose, dishwashers, clothes dryers, electricblankets, air-conditioners, drip-dry clothes -- and before man walked on themoon. We got married first -- and THEN lived together. How quaint can you be??

In our time, closets were for clothes, not for "coming out" of. Bunnies were small rabbits, and rabbits were not Volkswagons. Designer jeans were scheming girls named Jean or Jeannie. And having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with our cousins. We thought fast food was what we ate during lent, and Outer Space was the back of the Riviera Theatre. We were born before house-husbands, gay rights, computer dating, dual careers and computer marriages. We were born before day-care centers, group therapy and nursing homes. We never heard of FM radio, tape decks, electric typewriters, artificial hearts, word processors, yogurt, and guys wearing earrings. For us, "time sharing" meant togetherness -- not computers or condominiums, a "chip" meant a piece of wood, hardware meant hardware, and software wasn't even a word! In 1940, "Made in Japan" meant JUNK and the term "making out" referred to how you did on your exam. Pizzas, McDonalds and instant coffee were unheard of. We hit the scene when there were Five and Dime stores where you bought things for 5 and 10 cents. You could buy ice cream cones for a nickel or a dime, and for one nickel you could ride a street car, make a phone call, buy a Pepsi, or buy enough stamps to mail one letter and TWO postcards! You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600. ... but who could afford one?? A pity, too, because gas was only 11 cents a gallon. In our day, Cigarette smoking was fashionable; Grass was mowed; Coke was a cold drink; Pot was something you cooked in; Rock Music was a grandmother's lullabye; and AIDS were helpers in the Principal's office. We were certainly not born before the difference between the sexes was discovered, but we were surely before the sex change -- we made do with what we had. And we were the LAST generation that was so dumb as to think you needed a husband to have a baby.

Hmmmmmmmm. .. so what happened to those "good old days???"

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...

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Scientists have invented, at the cost of $75 million in research, a robot that repels eyeliner, lipstick & mascara.
You couldn't make it up!

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A very absent-minded professor entered a crowded bus, with no available seats. Suddenly a little girl raised from her seat and offered it to the professor. He was astonished and said to her:
- You are a very good girl, what's your name?
- My name is Eve, daddy...

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Once a young Brahmin went to the house of a very respectable Old Brahmin to
ask for his young daughters hand. "My dear Sir", he goes "I have heard that
your daughter has all the good qualities of a Bahu"?
The old brahmin answered "Haan! more...

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Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us all to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two of our sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily none us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for more...

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