"God Will Save Me.." joke
There came a big flood, and the water around Bhola's house was rising steadily.. Bhola was standing on the porch, watching water rising all around him, when a man in a boat came along and called to Bhola, "Get in the boat and I'll get you out of here. Bhola replied, "No thanks, God will save me." Bhola went into the house, and the water was starting to pour in. So, he went up to the second floor. As he looked out, another man in a boat came along, and he called to Bhola, "Get in the boat and I'll get you out of here." Again, Bhola replied, "No thanks. God will save me." The water kept rising. So, Bhola got out onto the roof. A helicopter flew over, and the pilot called down to Bhola, "I'll drop you a rope, grab onto it, and I'll get you out of here." Again Bhola replied, "No thanks. God will save me." The water rose and rose, and soon nearly covered the whole house. Bhola fell in, and drowned. When he arrived in Heaven, he saw God, and asked Him, "Why didn't you save me from that terrible flood? Did I not show you my faith?" With a loving but irritated tone God replied, "What more would you have me do? I sent people in two boats and a helicopter?"
A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson; "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can more...
Once Chuck Norris had a boner.
Their were no survivors
A somewhat drunk man feels a bald man's head and says,"Say, your head feels just like my wife's ass."
The bald man feels his own head and says with a grin,"You know, you're right!"
Your daddy is so bald that when he puts on a turtle-neck he looks like a broken condom!