"Glass half full and empty of perspectives" joke
So you want to divide the world in to optimists and pessimists, huh? Check this out:
"The glass is half full."
"The glass is half empty."
"The glass is twice as big as it needs to be."
"The glass is full; half with water, half with air."
"The glass contains some water; I want a Coke!"
"The water is surrounded by a glass."
"The glass was half...something a minute ago. Now it's empty. [burp]"
Justin Williams told this joke on his Cajun Cooking show:
Two Cajuns, Rober' and Maurice, decided that hunting possums had gotten too dull, so they planned a trip to Canada to shoot moose. They flew in commercial planes all the way to Saskatoon, and from there, they hired a more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Do you wanna here a clean joke?
I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna here a dirty joke?
Bubbles is the girlnextdoor.
Ha Ha Ha
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.
Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!