"George W. Bush Meets Moses" joke
George W. Bush, in an airport lobby, noticed a man in a long flowing white robe with a long flowing white beard and flowing white hair. The man had a staff in one hand and some stone tablets under the other arm.
George W. approached the man and inquired, "Aren't you Moses."
The man ignored George W. and stared at the ceiling.
George W. positioned himself more directly in the man's view and asked again, "Aren't you Moses?"
The man continued to peruse the ceiling.
George W. tugged at the man's sleeve and asked once again, "Aren't you Moses?"
The man finally responded in an irritated voice, "Yes I am."
George W. asked him why he was so uppity.
Moses replied, "The last time I spoke to a Bush I had to spend forty years in the desert!"
A little boy hurts his finger, runs in the house, and calls out to his mother. "Oh," she says, "let me get a band-aid for that."
"No!" cries the boy, "Cider!"
"Cider?" the mother exclaims. "What on earth do you more...
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
Q. How do you know that a blonde's been on the computer using Microsoft Word?
A. There's White-out all over the screen!
A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.
"I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat the procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds."
When the blonde returns, she's lost more...