"George W. Bush Meets Moses" joke
George W. Bush, in an airport lobby, noticed a man in a long flowing white robe with a long flowing white beard and flowing white hair. The man had a staff in one hand and some stone tablets under the other arm.
George W. approached the man and inquired, "Aren't you Moses."
The man ignored George W. and stared at the ceiling.
George W. positioned himself more directly in the man's view and asked again, "Aren't you Moses?"
The man continued to peruse the ceiling.
George W. tugged at the man's sleeve and asked once again, "Aren't you Moses?"
The man finally responded in an irritated voice, "Yes I am."
George W. asked him why he was so uppity.
Moses replied, "The last time I spoke to a Bush I had to spend forty years in the desert!"
You know you're ghetto when you carry food stamps in a money clip!
Why don't vegetarian women scream during orgasms?
They refuse to admit that a piece of meat gives them pleasure!
President Clinton and his wife are at the first baseball game of the season. At the start of the game the pitcher comes up in the stands and whispers something in Clinton's ear.
All of a sudden Clinton looks at Hillary and yells, "Okay, Hillary, GET OUT!".
Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!
Your momma is so fat when she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck half way down.