"Daddy's hammer" joke

A little boy runs into the kitchen, crying.
His mother asks, "Johnny, why are you crying?"
Johnny cries, "Because daddy hit his thumb with
the hammer!"
His mother says, "You shouldn't cry because
of that. You should *laugh*!"
Johnny breaks out in tears anew and says,
"But I *did*!"

A man is in court. The Judges says,"on the 3rd August you are accused of killing your wife by beating her to death with a hammer, how do you plead?"
"Guilty", said the man in the dock.
At this point a man at the back of the court stood up and shouted more...

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19

your mamma is so ugly she makes blind kids scared

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71

- Wave properly you stupid bitch!
- Nan please, that's the Queen

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Knock Knock
Who's there!
Toucan!
Toucan who?
Toucan live as cheaply as one! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Toucan!
Toucan who?
Toucan play at this game!

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36

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Toucan!
Toucan who?
Toucan play at this game!

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