"Customer service" joke

The exhausted clerk had pulled down blanket after blanket from the shelf, but still the woman customer was not satisfied.
"There is one more blanket left," said the clerk. "Do you care to see it?"
"I'm not going to buy one today," said the woman. "I have only been looking for a friend."
"Well," said the clerk,"I'll take the last one down if you think your friend might be in it."
A couple of definitions from the Devil's Dictionary:
PATIENCE, n. A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.
MEEKNESS, n. Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.

I asked God to take away my pain.
God said, No.
It is not for me to take away,
but for you to give it up.
I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.
God said, No.
Her spirit was whole,
her body was only temporary.
I asked God to grant me more...

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