"Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight...." joke

Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight.

Scientists have invented, at the cost of $75 million in research, a robot that repels eyeliner, lipstick & mascara.
You couldn't make it up!

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Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn’t Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus’ birthday.

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Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.

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Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?

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Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again

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