"Caribbean Holiday" joke
A businessman and a lawyer were fishing in the Caribbean. Attempting to strike up a conversation, the lawyer said, "I'm here because my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed in the fire. My insurance paid for everything."
"What a coincidence," said the businessman. "I'm here because my house and all of my belongings were destroyed by a flood. Fortunately, my insurance company paid for everything too."
Looking a little confused, the lawyer asked, "How do you start a flood?"
Don't knock on Death's door.
Instead, ring the bell and run. Death hates that...
Q: What's the worst trick you can do to your blind brother?
A: Leave the plunger in the toilet
These four guys were walking down the street, a Saudi, a Russian, a North Korean, and a New Yorker.
A reporter comes running up and says, "Excuse me, what is your opinion about the meat shortage?"
The Saudi says, "Excuse me, what's a more...
Don't criticize your wife...if she were perfect, she would have married much better than you.
Q: How many radio astronomers does it take to change a light bulb.
A: None. They are not interested in that short wave stuff.