"Blonde Horseback Riding" joke
A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no
lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted & the
horse immediately springs into motion.
It gallops along at a steady & rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to
slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but
cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the
horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse
gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider.
Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try &
throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in
the stirrup & she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as
her head is struck against the ground again & again. As her head is
battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness
when...
the Wal-Mart manager runs out to shut the horse off.
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!
Arnold Schwartzinagor has a long one
Michael J. Fox has a short one
Madonna doesn't have one and
Bill Clinton uses his a lot
What is "it"?
A last name!
Now what were you thinking?