"Birth Control" joke
There were several women sitting around talking at their weekly club meeting.The topic of birth control came up and they started
comparing methods.
The first woman said that she and her husband relied on the pill. It
had been effective for them since they had started using it after
their 4th child was born.
The second woman said that she used the rhythm method. But she hated
having to watch the calendar.
The third woman said that she used condoms, but wished that her
husband would remember to buy them himself.
The fourth woman said
that she and her husband had found the perfect prevention method.
They used the "saucer and pail" method. All ears were opened at that
comment. She went on to explain... Her husband is shorter than
she, so he stands on a pail whenever they make love, and when his
eyes get as big as saucers, she kicks the pail out from underneath
him.
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!
Arnold Schwartzinagor has a long one
Michael J. Fox has a short one
Madonna doesn't have one and
Bill Clinton uses his a lot
What is "it"?
A last name!
Now what were you thinking?