"America's Christian Tradition" joke

The secular liberals in our country who want to take religion out of the public sphere and turn our children gay would have you believe that separation of Church and State was a concept invented by our founding fathers!
Not so! Our founding fathers had firm fundamentalist beliefs and wanted all Americans to also. Here are some historical facts the ACLU doesn't want you to know:

Did you know that faith in Christ is the only thing that finally got Thomas Jefferson off meth?
Did you know John Adams explored the American wilderness as a missionary, whipping bibles at brown people from the safety of his canoe?
Did you know that at parties, Ben Franklin liked to go on and on about Jesus until people felt awkward?
Did you know Abraham Lincoln used to tour the country lifting weights and breaking boards in half with his bare hands in order to witness to young people about Christ and the evils of interracial dating?
Did you know that George Washington once chopped down a cherry tree because it reminded him too much of a large penis and he was no queer?

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