"A Rabbi and a Confessional" joke

Hot 8 years ago

One day a priest had a doctor's appointment and needed someone to cover for him at the confessional, so he calls over an old school chum of his who happens to be a rabbi.
The rabbi had no idea what to do but agreed to cover for the priest. The priest needed to show the rabbi how everything worked, so when the first person came in the priest said, "What is your sin my son?"
The man said "I've commited adultery."
The priest asks, "How many times?"
The man says, "3 times."
The priest replies, "Do 10 Hail Marys, then put $5 in the donation box."
Then the second man comes in and says he committed adultery also. When asked how many times he said 3. The priest replied again, "Do 10 Hail Marys then put $5 in the donation box."
The rabbi tells the priest he has got the hang of it and that he should go to the doctor's now.
After the rabbi is alone another man comes up to the confessional.
The rabbi asks, "What is your sin?"
The man replies, "I've committed adultery."
The rabbi asks, "How many times?"
The man says, "Once."
The rabbi says, "Go home, do it 2 more times. We're having a special today. 3 for $5."

A principal of a small middle school had a problem with a few of the older girls starting to use lipstick. After applying lipstick in the bathroom they would then press their lips to the mirror and leave lip prints [purportedly practicing the perfect pucker].
Before it got more...

A Texan walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles... The salesgirl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge more...

A ten year old boy was accused of rape and at the circuit court,
his case was called and his lawyer a female, quickly, lifted the boy on top of a table, opened his zip, pulled out his penis and asked, My Lord, Can this small penis rape and defile a 25 year old girl?
Shh! more...

Here's a joke my uncle told me:
Through some cosmic fluke, Reagan, Thatcher, and Gorbachev all died on
the same day. Off they went to the gates of Heaven. Peter, seeing that
these were all VIPs, sent them straight off to the Almighty.
God, sitting on his throne, more...

A physician visited a California mental institution and asked a patient "How did you get here? What is the nature of your illness?"
He got this reply.
"It started when I got married and I guess I should never have done it. I got hitched to a widow with a more...

Be first to comment!
remember me
follow replies
Funny Joke? 6 vote(s). 83% are positive. 0 comment(s).