"A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this..." joke
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Scientists have invented, at the cost of $75 million in research, a robot that repels eyeliner, lipstick & mascara.
You couldn't make it up!
Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn’t Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus’ birthday.
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?
Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again