Dave works hard at the plant and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says,' Hey Dave, how ya doin?'
His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.' Oh no,' says Dave.' He's on my bowling team.'
When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual Budweiser. His wife is becoming uncomfortable and says,' You must come here a lot for that woman to know you drink Budweiser.'
'No honey, she's in the Ladies Bowling League. We share lanes with them.'
A stripper comes over to their table and throws her arms around Dave.' Hi Davey,' she says,' Want your usual table dance?'
Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club. Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in more...
Bob works hard and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Bob! How ya doin?" His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no," says Bob. "He's on my bowling team."
When they are seated, a waitress asks Bob if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, "How did she know that you drink Budweiser?" "She's in the Ladies' Bowling League,honey. We share lanes with them."
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Bob and starts to rub herself all over him and says,"Hi Bobbie. Want your usual table dance, big boy?" Bob's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Bob follows and spots more...
Frank is a hard worker, puts in a lot of overtime and spends most of his evenings bowling or working out at the gym. His wife, Susan, feels he is pushing himself too hard so, for his birthday, she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Frank, how ya doing tonight?" Susan is puzzled and asks Frank if he's been to the club before. "No, honey," Frank replies, "He's just a guy that works out at the same gym I go to."
When they are seated, a waitress approaches and asks Frank if he'd like his usual scotch. Susan, now becoming uncomfortable, says, "You must come here often for her to know that you drink scotch."
"No, she's in the Ladies Bowling League and we share lanes with them," Frank explains.
Just then, a stripper comes over to their table, throws her arms around Frank and says, "Hi, gorgeous, want your usual table dance?"
Now furious, Susan grabs her purse and more...
I woke up early feeling a little depressed because it was my birthday, and I thought, "Another year older", but decided to make the best of it.
So I showered and shaved, knowing when I went down to breakfast my wife would greet me with a big kiss and say Happy Birthday, dear.
All smiles, I went into breakfast and there sat my wife reading the newspaper as usual. She didn't say one word. So I got myself a cup of coffee and thought to myself, oh well, she just forgot.
The kids will be in in a few minutes all cheery and they will sing Happy Birthday and have a nice gift for me. There I sat, enjoying my coffee, and I waited.
Finally the kids came running in yelling, "Give me a slice of toast", "I'm late", "Where is my coat", and "I'm going to miss the bus". Feeling more depressed than ever, I left for the office.
When I walked into the office, my secretary greeted me with a smile and a "Happy Birthday, Boss" more...
(Brad, granted this is old, but I hadn't heard it in a while and smirked at it:)
A farmer decides that his 3 sows should be bred, and contacts his buddy
down the road, who owns 3 male pigs. They agree on a stud fee, and the
farmer puts the sows in his pickup and brings them down the road to the
males. He leaves them all day, and when he picks them up that night, asks
the man how he can tell if it 'took' or not. The breeder replies that
if, the next morning, the sows were grazing on grass, they were pregnant,
but if they were rolling in the mud as usual, they probably weren't...
Comes the morn, the sows are rolling in the mud as usual, so the farmer
puts them in the truck and brings them back for a second full day of
frolic. This continues for a week, since each morning the sows are
rolling in the mud.
About the sixth day, the farmer wakes up and tells his wife, "I don't
have the heart to look again. This is getting more...