Urologist Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    This 82-year-old man married a 22-year-old woman and they decided that they wanted to have kids. So after trying for a while with no success, he went to see the urologist, pretty discouraged. The urologist said not to get discouraged and that they could run some tests."Take this specimen jar into the bathroom and leave me a specimen to test," the doctor said.The old man closed the door, and about an hour and a half later, still had not come out. The doctor came by and asked, "Are you alright?""No" the old man said. "This just isn't going to work." he dejectedly explained. "There's no hope for me, I've worn out my left hand, I've worn out my right hand, I've run cold water over it, and I've run hot water over it. I've even thumped it on the edge of the sink.But no way can I get the top off this specimen jar!"

    This 82-year-old man married a 22-year-old woman and they decided that they wanted to have kids. So after trying for a while with no success, he went to see the urologist, pretty discouraged. The urologist said not to get discouraged and that they could run some tests.
    "Take this specimen jar into the bathroom and leave me a specimen to test," the doctor said.
    The old man closed the door, and about an hour and a half later, still had not come out. The doctor came by and asked, "Are you alright?"
    "No" the old man said. "This just isn't going to work." he dejectedly explained. "There's no hope for me, I've worn out my left hand, I've worn out my right hand, I've run cold water over it, and I've run hot water over it. I've even thumped it on the edge of the sink.
    But no way can I get the top off this specimen jar!"

    The notice on Dr. Jack Cassell's practice says, "If you voted for Obama, seek urologic care elsewhere. Changes to your healthcarebegin right now, not in four years."
    I hope this starts a war... can't wait to see it. A New York urologist willpost, "Pissed off by the Republicans in Congress,I'll be glad to help."

    Then we'll see other competing professions' postings. One prostitutewill have a sign, "If you voted for Obama,don't ask me my prices, you've already been screwed." While anotherprostitute will have, "Are you a Republican? Go to your mistress, thereare some things that even I won't do for money."

    Got any others?

    This 82-year-old man married a 22-year-old woman and they decided that they wanted to have kids. So after trying for a while with no success, he went to see the urologist, pretty discouraged. The urologist said not to get discouraged and that they could run some tests." Take this specimen jar into the bathroom and leave me a specimen to test," the doctor said. The old man closed the door, and about an hour and a half later, still had not come out. The doctor came by and asked, "Are you alright?" "No" the old man said. "This just isn't going to work." he dejectedly explained. "There's no hope for me, I've worn out my left hand, I've worn out my right hand, I've run cold water over it, and I've run hot water over it. I've even thumped it on the edge of the sink. But no way can I get the top off this specimen jar!"

    A man goes to his doctor and complains that his penis is developing a bend in the middle. So the doctor ran a series of tests, and had the man return to his office to report the results. "Have you been in the Far East recently, within the last year or so?" "Why, yes," replied the man. "And did you have sex while over there?" The man looked worried. "Well, yes, once or twice." The doctor's face got a grave expression on it. "That's what I was afraid of. You have a new disease that's just starting to spread in this country. It's called' Hong Kong Dong.'" The man gulped. "What do you do for it? Is there a cure?" "Well, sort of. You see, there is no way to cure the disease, but you must have an operation." "An operation? What kind of operation?" "We cut off your penis." "Wow! Do you mind if I get a second opinion?" The doctor replied, "Of course not. In something of such a serious more...

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