Turner Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    In Manhatan a midget got onto the elevator.
    A few floors down a huge black man got in, and said "Do you know that my
    body weighs 300 pounds, in fact each one of my balls weighs 25 pounds, my
    dick is 35 inches long and my name is Turner Brown."
    The midget fainted dead away
    After being revived by the paramedics the midget asked the
    black man to repeat his last few words.
    The black man replied "I said my name is Turner Brown."
    "Thank God!" said the midget, "I thought you said 'turn around'".

    Two guys in an elevator

    Hot 6 years ago

    A small white guy went into an elevator, when he got in he noticed a huge black dude standing next to him. The big black guy looked down upon the small white guy and said, "7 foot tall, 350 pounds, 20inch dick, 3 pound left ball, 3 pound right ball, Turner Brown."

    The small guy fainted!!

    The huge black dude picked up the little white guy and brought him to, by slapping his face and shaking him. He asked the small white guy,

    "What's wrong?" Our petite friend said, "Excuse me, but what did you say?"

    The black giant looked down and repeated, "7 foot tall, 350pounds, 20 inch dick, 3 pound left ball, 3 pound right ball, my name is Turner Brown"

    The white guy sighed, "Oh, thank God! I thought you said Turn around!!'"

    Turner Brown

    Hot 6 years ago

    A little guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this huge guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says, "7 feet tall, 350 lbs., 20 inch penis, testicles 3 lbs. each, Turner Brown."
    The small guy just faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big dude kneels down and brings him to, by slapping and shaking him. He asks, "Are you Ok?" In a very weak voice the little guy says, "Excuse me, but what did you just say to me?"
    The big dude says, "When I saw the curious look on your face, I just figured I'd give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. "I'm 7 feet tall, weigh 350 lbs., have a 20 inch penis, my testicles weigh 3 lbs. each. And my name is Turner Brown."
    The small guy says, "Thank God! I thought you said Turn Around".

    Christmas Cake Recipe

    Hot 5 years ago

    CHRISTMAS CAKE RECIPE You'll need the following: 1 cup of water
    1 cup of sugar
    4 large brown eggs
    2 cups of dried fruit
    1 teaspoon of salt
    1 cup of brown sugar
    Lemon juice
    Nuts
    1 bottle of whisky
    Sample the whisky to check for quality. Take a large bowl. Check the whisky again. To be sure it's the
    highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter
    in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again. Make sure the whisky is still OK.
    Cry another tup. Tune up the mixer. Beat two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried
    fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fired druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it goose with a drewscriver.
    Sample the whisky to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares?
    Check the whisky. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon the sugar or something. Whatever you can more...

    Medical Office Sign

    Hot 3 years ago

    Two doctors opened an office in a small town, and put up a sign reading "Dr. Greene and Dr. Turner, Psychiatry and Proctology".
    The town council wasn't happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to "Hysterias and Posteriors".
    This was unacceptable too, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids." Still no go.
    Next they tried "Catatonics and High Colonics". Thumbs down again.
    Then came "Manic-depressives and Anal Retentives". Still no good.
    How about "Minds and Behinds"? Once more, unacceptable.
    Next they tried, "Lost Souls and Ass Holes". Still no go.
    They even tried "Analysis and Anal Cysts", "Nuts and Butts", "Freaks and Cheeks" and "Loons and Moons", all of which were also unacceptable.
    Nearing their wit's ends, the doctors finally came up with a business slogan they thought might be more...

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