Turd Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two bananas are lying on a river bank when a turd comes floating by. The turd looks over and says, "Hey! Come on in! The water's fine!" One banana turns to the other banana and says, "Do you believe that shit?"

Funny euphemisms people use for farts. ..
Gravy Pants
Firing Scud Missiles
Turd Honking
Mud Duck
Panty Burps
Pant Stainers
Cut the Cheese
Trouser Cough
K-Fart
Crack Splitters
Turd Tooties
Anal Audio
Great Brown Cloud
Exercising the meat nozzle

What do you call an attractive but contemptible man?

A hot turd.

MOST SEMEN SWALLOWED
Michelle Monahan had 1.7 pints of semen pumped out of her stomach in Los Angeles in July 1991.

LONGEST PUBES
Maoni Vi of Cape Town has hair measuring 32 inches from the armpits and 28 inches from her vagina.

MOST CAVERNOUS CROTCH
Linda Manning of Los Angeles could, without preparation, completely insert a lubricated American football into her vagina.

WORST DRINK
The most horrible drink to be considered a beverage and safely drunk is Khoona. It is drunk by Afghani tribesmen on their wedding night and consists of a small amount of still-warm very recently attained bull semen. It is believed to be a potent aphrodisiac.

MOST OFFENSIVE COCKTAIL
This is available from a few select bars in New York. It contains tomato juice, a double shot of vodka, a spoonful of French mustard and a dash of lime. It is not mixed, but served with a tampon (unused) instead of a cocktail umbrella and is known as a' Cunt more...

Gravy Pants

Firing Scud Missiles

Turd Honking

Mud Duck

Panty Burps

Pant Stainers

Cut the Cheese

Trouser Cough

K-Fart

Crack Splitters

Turd Tooties

Anal Audio

Great Brown Cloud

Exercising the meat nozzle