Tissue Jokes / Recent Jokes

There was a boy washing his face, the boy needs a tissue, right at the back of the boy there was a mummy, then the boy said "where is that tissue?" then the boy wrapped the mummy and used it as a tissue.

There once was a man who was traveling to FLORDIA AND HE STOPED AT A GAS SATATION TO USE THE BATHROOM. SO HE WENT TO USE THE BATHROOM AND HE HAD TO DUKIE AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE RELAIZED THAT THERE WAS NO TISSUE AND THEN HE READ THIS SIGN SAYING: THERE IS NO TISSUE HERE SO TAKE YOUR TWO FINGERS AND WIPE YOUR BUTT WITH THEM AND STICK THEM THROUGH THIS HOLE AND YOUR FINGERS WILL BE LICKED BY HUMAN HANDS.SO THE MAN SAY I AM NOT DOING THAT SO HE SAT THERE FOR 2 HOURS AND UNTIL HE FINALLY DID. AND BEHIND THE WALL WAS A MAN WITH TWO BRICKS AND THE MAN SMASHED HIS FINGERS WITH THE TWO BRICKS AND THEN THE MAN JUMPED AND PUT HIS FINGERS IN HIS MOUTH AND STARTED SCREAMING.

If Scientists Wrote Nursery Rhymes How many can you solve? (Answers below)1. A research team proceeded toward the apex of a natural geologicprotuberance, the purpose of their expedition being the procurement ofa sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact sizeof which was unspecified. One member of the team precipitantly descended, sustaining severe fractural damage to the upper cranial portion of hisanatomical structure. Subsequently, the second member of the teamperformed a self-rotational translation oriented in the direction takenby the first member. 2. Complications arose during an investigation of dietary influence: oneresearcher was unable to assimilate adipose tissue and another was unableto consume tissue consisting chiefly of muscle fiber. By reciprocalarrangement between the two researchers, total consumption of the viandsunder consideration was achieved, this leaving the original container ofthe viands devoid of contents. 3. A young male human was more...

A man and a woman are sitting beside each other in the first class section of the plane.
The woman sneezes, takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose, and shudders quite violently in her seat.
The man isn't sure why she is shuddering and goes back to reading.
A few minutes pass. The woman sneezes again. She takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose and shudders quite violently in her seat.
The man is becoming more and more curious about the shuddering.
A few more minutes pass. The woman sneezes yet again. She takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose and shudders violently again.
The man has finally had all he can handle. He turns to the woman and says, "Three times you've sneezed and three times you've taken a tissue and wiped your nose then shuddered violently!
Are you sending me signals, or are you going crazy?"
The woman replies, "I'm sorry if I disturbed you. I have a rare condition and when I sneeze, I have an orgasm."
The man, now more...

A Crow Shits On Banta. Preeto Gives Tissue Paper To Him.

Banta: Koi Faayda Nahin, Kauwa Toh Udd Gaya. .

How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it.

If Scientists Wrote Nursery Rhymes How many can you solve? (Answers below)1. A research team proceeded toward the apex of a natural geologicprotuberance, the purpose of their expedition being the procurement ofa sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact sizeof which was unspecified. One member of the team precipitantly descended, sustaining severe fractural damage to the upper cranial portion of hisanatomical structure. Subsequently, the second member of the teamperformed a self-rotational translation oriented in the direction takenby the first member.2. Complications arose during an investigation of dietary influence: oneresearcher was unable to assimilate adipose tissue and another was unableto consume tissue consisting chiefly of muscle fiber. By reciprocalarrangement between the two researchers, total consumption of the viandsunder consideration was achieved, this leaving the original container ofthe viands devoid of contents.3. A young male human was situated more...