Thorn Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    African Safari

    Hot 2 years ago

    A man goes to Africa on a safari. While there, he comes upon an
    elephant in great pain, with a giant thorn in its foot. The man
    very carefully approaches the elephant, and gingerly removes the
    thorn from its foot. The elephant begins to walk away, then turns
    and stares at the man for a full minute, locking eyes with him.
    The elephant then continues on its way.
    I wonder if I ever see that elephant again if it will remember
    the man muses to himself.
    It is a few years later, and the man is at a circus back in the
    He notices that one of the elephants keeps looking at him, almost
    like it KNOWS him. The man wonders, "
    Could this be that elephant
    I helped so long ago?"
    He decides to get a closer look. With the elephant still giving
    him the staredown, the man moves in closer, getting right up in
    front of the elephant. They lock eyes. A knowing look seems to
    cross the elephant's more...

    Tough Thorn

    Hot 5 years ago

    During the Israeli-Arab war, the Arabs were getting slaughtered. Their general called his men together, look men we have to take drastic action. Shoot on sight any Israelis, no questions asked.
    It was getting late. A very young Israeli man comes wandering down the path towards the Arab camp.
    The Arabs decide to have some fun. Look, we're supposed to execute you but we'll let you go if you pass 3 tests.
    There are 3 tents, in the first is a bottle of liquor, which you must drink completely without stopping.
    In the second is the Sheik's favorite lion who has had a thorn in his paw for 3 days and no one has been able to get close enough to get it out. You must remove the thorn.
    In the third is the Sheik's favorite wife. She has not been happy in a long time. You must satisfy her.
    The young man cautiously approaches the first tent, enters and they hear him chugging the entire bottle in one long breath. He stumbles out feebly and on to the next tent.
    The Arabs more...

    A man was sailing down the river amazon in a canoe, when he was hit by a poison dart. He woke up some time later in a cage, surrounded by a tribe chief and his minions. The chief said "You have been tresspassing on our tribes private property. You will be doomed to death by ravens pecking out your insides. However, if you pass our 2 tests, you will be allowed to go. The first of which is a test of courage, of bravery, of strength. You must go into the first tent, and there you will find a lion, a lion with a thorn in its paw. The second challenge is one of compassion, thought and love. You must shag the 10 most beautiful ladies of our tribe. Now, let the challenges begin..."
    The man goes into the tent and at first, there is much roaring and howling, but eventually it calms down. Then the man comes out and says "That's the first challenge done! Now where are those 10 beautiful ladies who I must pull thorns out of their paws?"

    Q: Why did the chicken not walk on the thorn?
    A: Because it didn't want to get poked
    Q: Why did the chicken swallow the thorn?
    A: So it didn't have to step on it
    Q: Why was the road bumpy?
    A: Because it had loads of bumps

    An elephant is walking through the jungle when she gets a thorn in her foot. She is in absolute agony until an ant strolls by. So the elephant says, "Help me, help me." But the ant refuses unless the elephants agrees to let the ant have his wicked way with her. Replies the elephant, "Anything! Anything!" So, out comes the thorn and up gets the ant and proceeds to enjoy himself. Meanwhile, in a tree directly above them, a monkey, who witnessed the whole episode, was in knots of laughter. Consequently he fell out of the tree on top of the elephant. Says the elephant: "Ouch!" Says the ant, in his own little frenzy: "Suffer BITCH, SUFFER!!!"

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