Term Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A true Southerner knows what "catywompus" means.
    A true Southerner knows the difference between a "hissie fit"
    and a "conniption" and they don't "HAVE" them, they "PITCH" them.
    Only a true Southerner can show or point out to you the general
    direction of "YONDER".
    A true Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is - as in:
    "Going to town, be back directly."
    Even true Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a
    request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty
    little bowl on the middle of the table.
    All true Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is.
    They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
    A true Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of
    solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken
    and a big bowl of cold potato salad. (If the neighbor's more...

    Battle Hymn Of Term Finals
    (Sung to The Battle Hymn Of The Republic) Mine eyes have seen the horror
    Of the ending of the term
    It has poisoned all my spirits
    Like an apple with a worm
    It's infected all my freedom
    Like an ugly cancer germ
    The truth shall soon be known. Chorus:
    Failure, failure, degradation,
    Failure and humiliation,
    Failure, failure, academia,
    The truth shall soon be known. I have listened to the teachers
    But the homework leaves me cold
    I have never done assignments
    Although many times been told
    I have even missed my classes
    When I was feeling bold
    The truth shall soon be known Chorus:
    Failure, failure, degradation,
    Failure and humiliation,
    Failure, failure, academia,
    The truth shall soon be known. They are adding all my points up
    And I haven't earned but few
    In fact, I haven't even gotten
    More than one or two
    Oh, if I could only find an more...

    Indemnity

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    By using this site you agree to defend, indemnify, and hold harmless the web site, its officers, directors, employees and agents, from any claims, actions or demands, including without limitation reasonable legal and accounting fees, alleging or resulting from your use of the material or your breach of the terms of this agreement. The web site shall provide notice to you promptly of any such claim, suit, or proceeding and shall reasonably assist you, at your expense, in defending any such claim, suit or proceeding.
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    Spanish singer Julio Iglesias was on television with British TV host Anne Diamond when he used the word 'manyana'. Diamond asked him to explain what it meant. He said that the term means "maybe the job will be done to-morrow, maybe the next day, maybe the day after that. Perhaps next week, next month, next year. Who cares?" The host turned to Irishman Shay Brennan who was also on the show and asked him if there was an equivalent term in Irish. "No. In Ireland we don't have a word to describe that degree of urgency.", replied Brennan.

    When I went to college in the 1980's, I heard a lot of words like "data input" and "beta version." They confused me. I wanted desperately to know what people were talking about, what Big Secret resided in the computer industry.
    Now that I've worked in a computer company for the last few years, I've gained an insider's perspective. I decided to share my knowledge with the uninitiated by creating the following brief, handy glossary:
    Alpha. Software undergoes alpha testing as a first step in getting user feedback. Alpha is Latin for "doesn't work."
    Beta. Software undergoes beta testing shortly before it's released. Beta is Latin for "still doesn't work."
    Computer. Instrument of torture. The first computer was invented by Roger "Duffy" Billingsly, a British scientist. In a plot to overthrow Adolf Hitler, Duffy disguised himself as a German ally and offered his invention as a gift to the surly dictator. The plot worked. On more...

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