Taurus Jokes

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    The Fart Zodiac

    Hot 2 years ago

    Aries

    The Ram. Their farts are "Built Ram Tough". They may feel like Curly-Qs coming out of their asses because their farts mimic the curves of a ram's horns. They, the farts, sometimes like to butt heads with other farts. Since people born under the sign of Aries show strong leadership and like to get things started, they are always the first ones to fart while around other people. Their farts tend to be loud since they are energetic. Do you like to hear robust farts? Too shy to be the first one to fart? Get with an Aries.

    Taurus

    The Bull. Their farts can be very stubborn, and once released, they can stink up a space with power for very long periods of time-longer than average. Their farts just don't want to go away. Their farts can even be kinda sharp and hurt their *******s when they come out, because they are big and mimic the sharp horns of the bull. Since Taurus people love sensual pleasures, they must take care not to over-indulge and more...

    ARIES
    You are the pioneer type and hold most people in contempt. You are quick-tempered, impatient, and scornful of advice. You are not very nice.
    TAURUS
    You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bull-headed. Taurus people have BO.
    GEMINI
    You are a quick and intellectual thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. However, you are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are cheap.
    CANCER
    You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems. They think you are a sucker. You are always putting things off. That's why you'll never make anything of yourself. Most Welfare recipients are Cancer people.
    LEO
    You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are pushy. Most Leo people are bullies. You are vain and dislike honest criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieves.
    VIRGO
    You are the logical type and more...

    ARES (March 21 to April 19):
    Chickens born under the sign of Ares are natural leaders possessing a pioneering determined spirit, who wish to make their mark on the world. They cross the road to assert themselves and seek action, daring and adventure.
    TAURUS (April 20 to May 20):
    Taurus chickens are strong willed and have a down to earth attitude toward life. They are overly interested in material things and have a real need for security. They feel unsettled unless comfortable. They will cross only if there is more security on the other side or to obtain material possessions.
    GEMINI (May 21 to June 20):
    They are highly restless and are always seeking a wide variety of contrasting experiences. They cross because they do not know what is on the other side and to avoid the boredom of their mundane existence.
    CANCER (June 21 to July 22):
    While having a tough shell-like exterior, Cancer chickens are very sensitive and vulnerable. They have very delicate emotions, more...

    ARIES WOMEN: Wildly sensual, passionate and adventurous. You'll have sex anywhere, you know what you want - intense and frequent sex, you have a need for complete control, but you're also in love with love. As a mate, you are ardent, loyal, sentimental, and earthly. Biggest thrill - the tickle of a man's facial fuzz.

    ARIES MEN: Sleeping with him is like playing croquet with live bombs - you never know what is going to happen! Never expect him to wait for you to be ready - he will rip your clothes off if he is ready to go. Don't tease him or you'd better be ready to deliver. Fond of slave master games and he likes it rough. Aries men are also explorers, so be ready to go where no woman has gone before. His favourite position: a woman on her knees leaning forward.

    TAURUS WOMEN: You expect your man to be kind and patient and make love to you by the book. Like to be pleased by sex, but don't look for unusual approaches. But you are a demanding lover and leave your more...

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