Tattoo Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Tatto on Hips

    Hot 6 months agoby Pearl White

    Bill and Binny were couple. Biny wanted to give surprise on their 1st Anniversary. So Binny decided to having tattoo of Letter B on both hips each, and she had. On return to home, she saw her hubby Bill was sitting on Sofa, so she turned back and dropped the pant and showed the hip to him. Bill shouted: "Who is the hell is BOB?!!"

    A white guy is being shipped off to Jamaica for a year with the army.
    His fiance, Wendy, is really worried about her man being unfaithful, so she asks him to tattoo her name to his penis...He agrees, and does so.
    When his penis isn't erect you can see the letters W and Y.
    The woman feeling secure knowing that her name is tattooed on her man's penis says good-bye to her fiance and he leaves for Jamaica.
    One day, while in Jamaica, the guy is at the urinal and a black Jamaican comes and stands at the urinal next to him... The white guy happens to notice that the Jamaican also has a tattoo on his penis and he could see the letters W and Y, so he says to the Jamaican, "Wow, that's really interesting, I guess you have a girlfriend named Wendy too?"
    And the Jamaican looks at him with a puzzled look and then stretches out his penis and it says...
    "Welcome to Jamaica have a nice day!"

    Romantic Tattoo

    Hot 2 years agoby Martin

    My girlfriend thought it would be romantic to have tattoos of each other's names.

    So she got a tattoo with my name and I changed her name by deed poll to Newcastle United.

    SHORTY

    Hot 4 months ago

    A brand new prostitute at a Nevada brothel was assigned her first customer. She went into the room with the customer and just less than a minute later, came out laughing hysterically. The madam confronted her, saying, "You were with him less than a minute and came out laughing. That's no way to treat a customer."
    The rookie prostitute replied, "I just couldn't help it. He undressed and when I looked down at his dick it was the size of a peanut and had a tattoo on it which says 'SHORTY'!"
    The madam was furious, and assigned a veteran prostitute to go in and give this poor guy his money's worth.
    A half hour later, the veteran prostitute came out of the room. She could barely walk and her eyes were beaming! She kept saying "WOW!" over and over again. She walked over to the rookie prostitute and said, "You needed to spend more time with this guy. When he gets excited that tattoo reads: 'SHORTY'S BAR AND GRILL - FINE DINING - ALBUQUERQUE, NEW more...

    A lady was a huge Paul MCCartney fan and wanted a tattoo of him on the inside of her thigh. She went to the parlour and told the guy what she wanted.
    He says: "OK, take your skirt and underwear off and sit in the chair with your legs apart".
    She did that and he started on the tattoo. Pretty soon he's done, blows off the dust and admires his work.
    "Who the heck's that?" she says. "It's Paul McCartney", he replies.
    "Doesn't look like him at all" says she. "Now get it right or I'll report you".
    So the tattooist starts on the other thigh. Really trying hard to do a better job. Finally he's done, blows off the dust and feels pretty good.
    The woman is pissed off "No way that's Paul Mccartney" she says. "It bloody well is" says the man. "Listen I'll get a second opinion"
    He goes out of his store and grabs the first person he sees. The guy is a drunk who's been stumbling along the more...

  • Recent Activity