Tamil Jokes / Recent Jokes

1. IF YOU CONSIDER ONLY TAMIL AS THE MEDIUM OF INSTRUCTION IN ALL PLACES.

2. IF YOU EAT ONLY RICE ALWAYS.

3. IF WATER IS MORE PRECIOUS THAN GOLD BECAUSE WATER IS MORE PRECIOUS HERE.

4. IF YOU WILL NOT HELP ANOTHER TAM SUCCEED, IF HE SUCCEEDS YOU WILL BE THE MOST UNHAPPY PERSON IN THE WORLD

5. IF YOU THINK ANNA UNIVERSITY IS THE BEST FOR ENGINEERING AND YOU DON'T KNOW THAT THERE EXISTS AN IIT MADRAS

6. IF YOU SAY VANAKKAM TO A FOREIGNER INSTEAD OF SHAKING HANDS WITH HIM.

7. IF YOU CAN EVEN DARE TO TEASE A CHENNAI FEMALE.

8. IF THE ONLY CAREER OPTION IS IN SOFTWARE.

9. IF YOUR FINAL AIM TO LIVE IN USA EVEN THOUGH YOU WOULD BE A SWEEPER THERE.

10. IF YOU VOTE ONLY EITHER DMK OR AIADMK.

11. IF YOU ARE VERY STINGY TO SPEND ON AUTOS.

12. IF YOU HAVE RE. 1 WATER INSTEAD OF PEPSI WHEN YOU ARE THIRSTY.

13. IF YOU THINK S. RAMESH IS CAPABLE OF OPENING THE BATTING more...

Three guys, one Tamil, one British and one Sinhalese are speakers at the 5th International Deaf and Dumb Conference at London's Park Lane Hilton Hotel.
Tamil guy gets up to speak but then realises none of the audience will understand due to their disability. He therefore places his hands upon his head abd waves them like antlers. Suddenly the audience all clap.
The British and Sinhalese guys wonder why the audience clap - the Tamil guy says the antler gesture meant "dear" etc. Envious at the Tamils skills of improvisation the British guy then gets up to the stage and does a similar gesture but rubs his breast and groin. The audience clap even more enthusiastically.
The other two guys ask him what he actually said by way of the gestures. He replies " Dear Ladies and Gentleman". Not to let his country down, the Sinhalese guy then places his hands upon his head in antler way, rubs his breast and groin and then proceeds to unzip his fly, and masturbate more...

Hi, I've been studyinbg Engineering @ Coimbatore for a year now. This thesis is from my experiance.
These laws have been proven to be accurate during an experiment using 21 malayalee Engineering students of Tamil Nadu, India.
1) The amount of time taken to study for a paper is inversely proportional to the marks obtained in that paper.
2) The amount of notes distributed by a lecturer corresponds inversely to the actual knowledge of that person on the subject.
3) The lecturer is always wrong, the only exception being when the person is reading from a text.
4) At any point of time, the deadline to submit a paper always comes two days ahead of the required time.
5) No matter how long you stare at the monitor, the Mailbox will not load in your college lab system until your allocated time is over.
6) Your code will develop errors only when a faculty member is within 5 mts of your person.
7) The amount of internal marks granted to a student is more...

What are the degrees of egoism in Tamil Nadu?
I, Iyer, Iyengar.
What's the opposite of Gopalakrishnan?
Comepalakrishnan.
How do they start a road race in Tamil Nadu?
Ready.... Steady..... PO
What do you call a really colourful Tamilian?
Rangamannar Rangarajan.
How does a Tamilian introduce the tennis superstar Lendl?
Ivan Lendl (Ivan =' he' in Tamil).
What did the Tamilian call the tall building a Japanese built?
Nikumo Nikado (Will it or won't it stand?)
What is the opposite of Subramnium Swamy?
Subramanium Didn't See Me.

A lady arrived at the Madras airport after spending 36 hours in transit.

She was fully exhausted after such a long trip with her 6 young kids.

Collecting many suitcases, the family entered the cramped customs area.

A young customs official watched our entourage in disbelief, "Ma'am," he said, "do all these children and this luggage belong to you?"

"Yes, sir," the lady said with a sigh. "They're all mine."

The customs agent began his interrogation "Ma'am, do you have any weapons, contraband or illegal drugs in your possession?"

"Sir," she calmly answered, "if I'd had any of those items, I would have used them by now."

The 2 Miyans are working as teachers at Delhi Womens' College, both taking classes together. But the short & rotund Chota Miyan, who looks like a Bengali or Marathi, has become jealous of the tall & slender Burra Miyan, who looks like a Punjabi or Kashmiri & has become popular with the girls. So Chotoo lays out a plan to make them forget "Burroo" forever.
Finally, his day arrives. Both partners come to the class-room, which has about 100, mostly Punjabi & Oudhi, women.
"My Banus (girls), today we study male anatomy," Chotoo commences, opening his bag. He then takes out & holds up a specimen jar labelled "ARYAN MALE GENITALIA" which contains a small thumb-sized pink penis perched over 2 almond-sized testes. "This is what Punjabi Boys have," he states. "Maybe they remind you of your Yaar (lover), your Bhai (brother) or of Burroo !" Some girls giggle.
Next he takes out another jar labelled "DRAVIDIAN MALE more...

A lady arrived at the Madras airport after spending 36 hours in transit. She was fully exhausted after such a long trip with her 6 young kids. Collecting many suitcases, the family entered the cramped customs area.

A young customs official watched our entourage in disbelief, "Ma'am," he said, "do all these children and this luggage belong to you?"

"Yes, sir," the lady said with a sigh. "They're all mine."

The customs agent began his interrogation "Ma'am, do you have any weapons, contraband or illegal drugs in your possession?"

"Sir," she calmly answered, "if I'd had any of those items, I would have used them by now."