Taliban Jokes / Recent Jokes

Late Nite Jokes heard on T.V.
"There is now a $5 million dollar bounty on Osama bin Laden. Which marks the first time in history there has ever been a bounty on a guy's head who wears Bounty on his head."
— Jay Leno
"We are starting to learn more about Osama bin Laden. For his birthday one year, somebody gave him a $4 Timex. We know that. He is married to the daughter of a guy named Mullah Muhammed Omar. I think her name is Tiffany Omar. Insiders say that the marriage is not working out. Apparently they are living in separate caves."
— David Letterman
"It looks like now the military action is taking effect. They think that bin Laden's organization is starting to break down. Today satellite photos actually show the sand fleas are leaving his beard."
— David Letterman
"There are now rumors that the Taliban has been poisoning the food we have been dropping. We should make a deal with the people of Afghanistan. We'll more...

The Taliban's Fall TV Line-up

MONDAYS:
8: 00 - "Husseinfeld"
8: 30 - "Mad About Everything"
9: 00 - "Suddenly Sanctions"
9: 30 - "The Brian Benben Bin Laden Show"
10: 00 - "Allah McBeal"

TUESDAYS:
8: 00 - "Wheel of Terror and Fortune"
8: 30 - "The Price is Right If Usama Says Its Right"
9: 00 - "Children Are Forbidden From Saying The Darndest Things"
9: 30 - "Afganistans Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers"
10: 00 - "Buffy The Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer"

WEDNESDAYS:
8: 00 - "U. S. Military Secrets Revealed"
8: 30 - "Bowling For Food"
9: 00 - "Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pita Bread"
9: 30 - "Just Shoot Everyone"
10: 00 - "Veilwatch"

THURSDAYS:
8: 00 - "Matima Loves Chachi"
8: 30 - more...

Late Nite Jokes heard on T.V.
"There is now a $5 million dollar bounty on Osama bin Laden. Which marks the first time in history there has ever been a bounty on a guy's head who wears Bounty on his head."
— Jay Leno
"We are starting to learn more about Osama bin Laden. For his birthday one year, somebody gave him a $4 Timex. We know that. He is married to the daughter of a guy named Mullah Muhammed Omar. I think her name is Tiffany Omar. Insiders say that the marriage is not working out. Apparently they are living in separate caves."
— David Letterman
"It looks like now the military action is taking effect. They think that bin Laden's organization is starting to break down. Today satellite photos actually show the sand fleas are leaving his beard."
— David Letterman
"There are now rumors that the Taliban has been poisoning the food we have been dropping. We should make a deal with the people of Afghanistan. We'll more...

Late Nite Jokes heard on T.V."There is now a $5 million dollar bounty on Osama bin Laden. Which marks the first time in history there has ever been a bounty on a guy's head who wears Bounty on his head."- Jay Leno"We are starting to learn more about Osama bin Laden. For his birthday one year, somebody gave him a $4 Timex. We know that. He is married to the daughter of a guy named Mullah Muhammed Omar. I think her name is Tiffany Omar. Insiders say that the marriage is not working out. Apparently they are living in separate caves."- David Letterman"It looks like now the military action is taking effect. They think that bin Laden's organization is starting to break down. Today satellite photos actually show the sand fleas are leaving his beard."- David Letterman"There are now rumors that the Taliban has been poisoning the food we have been dropping. We should make a deal with the people of Afghanistan. We'll taste your food, you check our mail."- more...

At a hastily called press conference this morning, Taliban Minister of Emigration, Mohammed Ben Dover, warned the United States that if any further military action was taken against Afghanistan, Taliban authorities would not hesitate to cut off America's supply of convenience store managers and taxi-cab drivers.

Behind the Mule-Sack
Ossama Bin Laden's Family, ex-lovers and childhood friends comment about the Man and his Mule-Sack.
Mad About America
A Taliban couple decide to adopt the ways of the American life, only to find that there is no Chinese-take out in Afghanistan.
Hellraise Place
No walls - doesn't matter. A quaint Afghani-neighborhood brings together grenade throwing singles.... who fall in and out of love and bed.
E! Wild in Afghanistan
For the first time in their lives the woman of Afghanistan reveal what they are doing under a sheet all day.
Minefield
Ossam and friends, in a coffee shop with no electricity, discuss their hopes and dreams. which is a show about nothing.
Lifestyles of the Stench and Faceless
Join Afghani-TV as it explores the Taliban way of life.
The Weakest Fink
The Taliban joins as Ossama is proven to be "The Weakest Link - Goodbye."

My answer to "What to do with Bin Laden?" Well, this sounds good to me. It would be true poetic justice:

Killing him will only create a martyr. Holding him prisoner will inspire his comrades to take hostages to demand his release. Therefore, I suggest we do neither.

Let the Secret Service, Navy Seals, or whomever covertly capture him, fly him to an undisclosed hospital, and have surgeons quickly perform a complete sex change operation.

Then we return "her" to Afghanistan to live as a woman under the Taliban.