Strike Jokes / Recent Jokes

One day a priest saw a young boy was playing baseball by himself and stop to watch!
The boy threw the ball and swung he missed and said Fuck I missed, and repeated this once more!
The priest then decided to tell the to stop cursing by say: Young man if you swear once more the sky will darken and lightning shall strike down and strike you dead!
The boy thought whatever
So again he picked up his bat and threw the ball and missed and said Fuck I missed! Then just like the priest said the sky darkened and lighting struck and all of the sudden heard a loud voice say Fuck I missed!

THE NBA PLAYER ADOPTION PROGRAM NEEDS YOU! With an NBA player's strike against the team owners looming, now is the time for us to show the world just how much we care. It's just not right. Hundreds of basketball players in our very own country are living at or just below the seven-figure salary level! Atrocious! And, as if that weren't bad enough, they will be deprived of pay for several weeks-possibly a whole year-as a result of the strike. But now you can help! For about two thousand dollars a day-that's less than the cost of a large screen projection TV-you can help a basketball player remain economically viable during his time of need. Two thousand dollars a day may not seem like a lot of money to you, but to a basketball player it could mean the difference between a vacation spent golfing in Florida or a Mediterranean cruise. For you, two thousand dollars is nothing more than three months rent or mortgage payments. But to a basketball player, two thousand dollars a day will more...

THE NBA PLAYER ADOPTION PROGRAM NEEDS YOU!
With an NBA player's strike against the team owners looming, now is the time for us to show the world just how much we care. It's just not right. Hundreds of basketball players in our very own country are living at or just below the seven-figure salary level! Atrocious! And, as if that weren't bad enough, they will be deprived of pay for several weeks-possibly a whole year-as a result of the strike. But now you can help! For about two thousand dollars a day-that's less than the cost of a large screen projection TV-you can help a basketball player remain economically viable during his time of need.
Two thousand dollars a day may not seem like a lot of money to you, but to a basketball player it could mean the difference between a vacation spent golfing in Florida or a Mediterranean cruise. For you, two thousand dollars is nothing more than three months rent or mortgage payments. But to a basketball player, two thousand dollars a day more...

1. Include Your Children When Baking Cookies
2. Something Went Wrong In Jet Crash, Expert Says
3. Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers
4. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
5. Drunk Gets Nine Months In Violin Case
6. Survivor Of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
7. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
8. Prostitutes Appeal To Pope
9. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
10. British Left Waffles On Falkland Islands
11. Lung Cancer In Women Mushrooms
12. Eye Drops Off Shelf
13. Teachers Strike Idle Kids
14. Clinton Wins On Budget, But More Lies Ahead
15. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Axe
16. Plane Too Close To Ground, Crash Probe Told
17. Miners Refuse To Work After Death
18. Juvenile Court To Try Shooting Defendant
19. Stolen Painting Found By Tree
20. Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years In Checkout Counter
21. Killer Sentenced To Die For Second Time In 10 more...

OFFICE MEMO
Date: 1/18/96
SPINDLER CALLS IN AIR STRIKE, DESTROYS APPLE TO SAVE IT
Stock Price Increases 50%
“We’ll do it better, ” Says Microsoft
CUPERTINO, Calif. JANUARY 18, 1996
The massive pile of smoking rubble near Interstate 280 here in Cupertino was not the result of an earthquake or natural gas explosion, as officials first believed.
It now appears that the terrific explosion and fire at Apple Computer headquarters was the result of the first corporate-initiated airstrike on U. S. or California soil in U. S. history.
Sources within Apple have told newspapers that, in an effort to save Apple from an internal coup that would result in the breakup and sale of the company, embattled Apple CEO Michael Spindler called in elements of the California Air National Guard, based at Moffet Federal Air Station in Mountain View, Calif. to bomb and strafe his own headquarters.
Spindler allegedly called the California Air National Guard late more...

A little boy was overheard talking to himself as he strutted through the backyard, wearing his baseball cap and toting a ball and bat. "I'm the greatest hitter in the world," he announced.

Then, he tossed the ball into the air, swung at it, and missed.

"Strike One!" he yelled. Undaunted, he picked up the ball and said again, "I'm the greatest hitter in the world!" He tossed the ball into the air.

When it came down he swung again and missed. "Strike Two!" he cried.

The boy then paused a moment to examine his bat and ball carefully. He spit on his hands and rubbed them together.

He straightened his cap and said once more, "I'm the greatest hitter in the world!" Again he tossed the ball up in the air and swung at it. He missed. "Strike Three!"

"Wow!" he exclaimed. "I'm the greatest PITCHER in the world!"

Here are the best headlines of the year (yes, they are real)...1. Include Your Children When Baking Cookies2. Something Went Wrong In Jet Crash, Expert Says3. Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers4. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted5. Drunk Gets Nine Months In Violin Case6. Survivor Of Siamese Twins Joins Parents7. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms8. Prostitutes Appeal To Pope9. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over10. British Left Waffles On Falkland Islands11. Lung Cancer In Women Mushrooms12. Eye Drops Off Shelf13. Teachers Strike Idle Kids14. Clinton Wins On Budget, But More Lies Ahead15. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Ax16. Plane Too Close To Ground, Crash Probe Told17. Miners Refuse To Work After Death18. Juvenile Court To Try Shooting Defendant19. Stolen Painting Found By Tree20. Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years In Checkout Counter21. Killer Sentenced To Die For Second Time In 10 Years22. Never Withhold Herpes Infection From Loved One23. War Dims more...