Starbucks Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Blonde at Starbucks

    Hot 5 years ago

    A blonde is working at the local Starbucks. A lady walks in and orders an Iced Cappuccino.''Do you want it hot or cold?''

    Soda Jerks

    Hot 6 years ago

    Three people are arrested for trying to sell the secret formula for Coca Cola (Coke) to Pepsi. We've been able to split the atom, figure out the evolution of time, decode DNA. Yet we're still baffled by the secret ingredients in Coca Cola. Well here they are: cola nuts, water, seltzer, a ton of sugar, and a whole lot of gullible Americans. Americans that will buy anything they're told to. And don't get me started on Starbucks. Their secret for success: coffee, milk, sugar, and the same stupid, gullible Americans!

    Starbucks is going to eliminate trans fat from its stores. Said founder Howard Shultz, "Our new trans-fat free Frappacino will pad your ass without clogging your arteries."

    New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for classmates. com!
    There's a reason you don't talk to people for 25 years. Because you don't particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn.
    New Rule: Don't eat anything that's served to you out a window unless you're a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy's chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain? Trout?
    New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: lucky bastard.
    New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here's how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we're done.
    New Rule: There's no such thing as flavored water. There's a whole aisle of this crap at the supermarket, water, but without that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored more...

    I saw a woman breast-feeding at Starbucks the other day. I admit, I was moved. I mean, to be there for that kid's first latte. I was so impressed, I got in line... She poured me a grande. A little foamy, but delicious...

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