Skipped Jokes

This black guy was walking by a lake. Sitting next to the lake was an old Chinese guy skipping stones off the water. As he did, they made a sound. They sounded like this Change----Chang-Long. The black guy was amazed. He asked the Chinaman how he did that. The Chinaman said, "this is an enchanted lake". When you skip a small stone across the water, it tells you about your immediate ancestry. When you skip a larger stone, it tells you about your ancient ancestry. The Chinaman then picked up a larger stone and skipped cross the water. Long---Dong-Chow was the sound. The black guy picked up a stone and skipped across the water. Chim---Pan-Ze was the sound. "BULL SHIT" he said and threw anotherChim---Pan-Ze again. Really pissed now, he picked up the largest rock he could and threw it into the water Ba---Boon!

A pastor in Maine skipped services one Sunday to go bear hunting. Along the trail he turned a corner and collided with a bear. thepastor stumbled, backwards, slipped off the trail, and begantumbling down the mountain, the bear in hot pursuit. Finally thepastor crashed into a bolder, breaking both his legs and sendinghis rifle flying through the air, just out of his reach. As the bear closed in, the pastor cried out "Lord, I'm sorry forwhat I have done. Please forgive me and save me! - Lord pleasemake this bear a Christian". Suddenly the bear skipped to a halt at the pastor's feet, fellto it's knees, clasped it's paws together, began to weep andsaid "God bless this food which I am about to receive!"

A pastor in Maine skipped services one Sunday to go bear hunting.Along the trail he turned a corner and collided with a bear. thepastor stumbled, backwards, slipped off the trail, and begantumbling down the mountain, the bear in hot pursuit. Finally thepastor crashed into a bolder, breaking both his legs and sendinghis rifle flying through the air, just out of his reach. As the bear closed in, the pastor cried out "Lord, I'm sorry forwhat I have done. Please forgive me and save me! - Lord pleasemake this bear a Christian". Suddenly the bear skipped to a halt at the pastor's feet, fellto it's knees, clasped it's paws together, began to weep andsaid "God bless this food which I am about to receive!"