Skates Jokes / Recent Jokes

There was a cat and a mouse who went to heaven, and they were there at the same time. Well, the mouse approaches God`s throne, and God asks him, "So, how do you like it up here?" The mouse says, "It`s nice, but could I get a pair of roller skates?" God says, "Sure." So, the mouse gets his roller skates. Well, the next day, the cat approaches God`s throne, and the same question is directed at him. So, he answers, "It`s great! I didn`t know you had meals on wheels up here!"

A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, "You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking."

The cat thought for a mnute and then said, "All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on."

God said, "Say no more." Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow.

A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to Heaven together. God met the mice at the gates with the same offer that He made to the cat.

The mice said, "Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs and even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we would not have to run again."

God answered, "It is done." All the mice had beautiful little roller skates.

About a week later, God decided to check on the cat. He found her sound more...

One day, a cat dies of natural causes and goes to heaven, where he meets the Lord.
The Lord says to the cat, "You lived a good life, and if there is any way I can make your stay in heaven more comfortable, please let me know."
The cat thinks for a moment and says, "Lord, all my life I have lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wooden floor."
The Lord stops the cat and says, "Say no more," and a wonderful, fluffy pillow appears.
A few days later, six mice are killed in a tragic farming accident, and all of them go to heaven. Again, the Lord is there to greet them with the same offer.
The mice answer, "All our lives we have been chased. We have had to run from cats, dogs, and even women with brooms. Running, running, running; we're tired of running. Do you think we could have roller skates so that we don't have to run anymore?"
The Lord says, "Say no more" and fits each mouse with beautiful new more...

One day a cat loses its ninth life causes and goes to heaven.
There he meets the Lord Himself. The Lord says to the cat, "You lived a good life and if there is any way I can make your stay in Heaven more comfortable, please let me know."
The cat thinks for a moment and says, "Lord, all my life I have lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wooden floor."
The Lord stops the cat and says, "Say no more" and a wonderful fluffy pillow appears.
A few days later six mice are killed in a tragic farming accident and go to heaven. Again the Lord them and makes the same offer.
The mice answer, "All of our lives we have been chased. We have had to run from cats, dogs, and even women with brooms. We are tired of running. Do you think we could fit us with roller skates so we don't have to run anymore?"
The Lord says, "No problem" and suddenly each mouse has a beautiful pair of roller skates.
About a week later more...

One day, a cat dies of natural causes and goes to heaven, where he meets the Lord. The Lord says to the cat, "You lived a good life, and if there is any way I can make your stay in heaven more comfortable, please let me know." The cat thinks for a moment and says, "Lord, all my life I have lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wooden floor." The Lord stops the cat and says, "Say no more," and a wonderful, fluffy pillow appears. A few days later, six mice are killed in a tragic farming accident, and all of them go to heaven. Again, the Lord is there to greet them with the same offer. The mice answer, "All our lives we have been chased. We have had to run from cats, dogs, and even women with brooms. Running, running, running; we're tired of running. Do you think we could have roller skates so that we don't have to run anymore?" The Lord says, "Say no more" and fits each mouse with beautiful new roller skates. About a week more...

One day a cat dies of natural causes and goes to Heaven. There he
meets the Lord himself. The Lord says to the cat, "You lived a good life and
if there is any way I can make your stay in Heaven more comfortable,
please let Me know."

The cat thinks for a moment and says, "Lord, all my life I have lived
with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wooden floor." The Lord
stops the cat and says, "Say no more," and a wonderful fluffy pillow
appears.

A few days later six mice are killed in a tragic farming accident and
go to Heaven. Again the Lord is there to greet them with the same offer.
The mice answer, "All of our lives we have been chased. We have had to run
from cats, dogs, and even women with brooms. Running, running,
running;
we're tired of running. Do you think we could have roller skates so we
don't have to run anymore?" The Lord says, "Say no more...

What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates? A mobile sperm bank.