Shy Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    The Fart Zodiac

    Hot 2 years ago

    Aries

    The Ram. Their farts are "Built Ram Tough". They may feel like Curly-Qs coming out of their asses because their farts mimic the curves of a ram's horns. They, the farts, sometimes like to butt heads with other farts. Since people born under the sign of Aries show strong leadership and like to get things started, they are always the first ones to fart while around other people. Their farts tend to be loud since they are energetic. Do you like to hear robust farts? Too shy to be the first one to fart? Get with an Aries.

    Taurus

    The Bull. Their farts can be very stubborn, and once released, they can stink up a space with power for very long periods of time-longer than average. Their farts just don't want to go away. Their farts can even be kinda sharp and hurt their *******s when they come out, because they are big and mimic the sharp horns of the bull. Since Taurus people love sensual pleasures, they must take care not to over-indulge and more...

    THE SHY GUY


    A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman
    sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage,
    he finally goes over to her and asks tentatively.
    "Um, Would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?

    To which she responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs,
    "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!"

    Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally,
    the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he
    slinks back to his table. After a few minutes, the woman
    walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says,
    "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate
    student in psychology and I'm studying how people
    respond to embarrassing situations."

    To which he responds, at the top of his lungs,
    "What do you mean $200?"
    ***********************Hope you enjoied by reading************

    The worst kind of accountant to have is the shy, retiring type. His ledgers are a few million dollars shy, which is why he's retiring.

    A few beans short of chili.
    A few beers short of a six-pack / a six-pack short of a case.
    A few birds shy of a flock.
    A few blocks short of a filesystem.
    A few bombs/melons short of a full load.
    A few bricks short of a wall / hod / load / pile.
    A few chips short of a cookie.
    A few clowns short of a circus.
    A few clues shy of a solution.
    A few cold solder joints.
    A few ears short of a bushel.
    A few feathers short of a whole duck.
    A few few cylinders short of a full re-format.
    A few fish short of a string.
    A few french fries / one hamburger short of a Happy Meal.

    A very shy guy goes into a pub on Valentine's Day night and sees a beautiful woman sitting alone at the bar.
    After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I brought you a drink?"
    She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!"
    Everyone in the pub is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table totally red faced.
    After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologises. She smiles at him and says, "I'm really sorry if I embarrassed you just then. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."
    The man responds, at the top of his lungs, "No I will not pay $200!"

  • Recent Activity