Sheik Jokes / Recent Jokes

Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia. One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in."I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding to your profession."The sheik turns to the first man and asks him what he does for a living. "I'm a cop", says the first man. "Then we will shoot your penis off!", said the sheik.He then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living. "I'm a firemen", said the second man. "Then we will burn your penis off!", said the sheik.Finally, he asked the last man,"And you, what do you do for a living?" And the third man answered, with a sly grin, "I'm a lollipop salesman!"

Three guys were on business trips to Saudi Arabia. One day, they came upon this harem with over 100 beautiful women.
They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in. "I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will each die and in a way corresponding to your profession."
The sheik turns to the first man and asks him what he does for a living. "I'm a cop", says the first man. "Alright women, shoot his penis off!," said the sheik.
The sheik then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living. "I'm a firemen," said the second man. "Alright women, burn his penis off!," said the sheik.
Finally, he asked the last man, "And you, what do you do for a living?" And the third man answered, with a big smile on his face, "I'm a lollipop salesman."

During the Israeli-Arab war, the Arabs were getting slaughtered. Their general called his men together, look men we have to take drastic action. Shoot on sight any Israelis, no questions asked.
It was getting late. A very young Israeli man comes wandering down the path towards the Arab camp.
The Arabs decide to have some fun. Look, we're supposed to execute you but we'll let you go if you pass 3 tests.
There are 3 tents, in the first is a bottle of liquor, which you must drink completely without stopping.
In the second is the Sheik's favorite lion who has had a thorn in his paw for 3 days and no one has been able to get close enough to get it out. You must remove the thorn.
In the third is the Sheik's favorite wife. She has not been happy in a long time. You must satisfy her.
The young man cautiously approaches the first tent, enters and they hear him chugging the entire bottle in one long breath. He stumbles out feebly and on to the next tent.
The Arabs more...

There was a businesswoman who just made a million dollars for an Arabian Oil Sheik. When she was leaving the Oil Sheik offered her Diamonds and rubies and a Silver-plated Rolls Royce, but she declined.
The Sheik insisted so she said that she just started to golf and maybe a set of golf clubs would be nice.
A few weeks later she received a telegram from the sheik.
"So far I have bought you 3 golf clubs. I hope you aren't disappointed that only 2 of them have swimming pools."

Three men were on a trip to Saudi Arabia and stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. Just as they were beginning to get friendly with the women, the Sheik entered the tent.
"I am the master of all these women," the Sheik bellowed. "No one is to touch them but me! You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way that corresponds to your profession."
He then turned to the first man and asked what he did for a living.
"I'm a policeman," the man replied.
"Then we will shoot your penis off!" said the Sheik. He then turned to the second man and asked what he did for a living.
"I'm a fireman," replied the second man.
"Then we will burn your penis off!" said the Sheik. Finally, he asked the last man, ""And you, what do you do for a living?"
"I'm a lollipop salesman!" the third man answered, with a sly grin.

Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia. One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in." I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding to your profession." The sheik turns to the first man and asks him what he does for a living. "I'm a cop", says the first man. "Then we will shoot your penis off!", said the sheik. He then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living. "I'm a firemen", said the second man. "Then we will burn your penis off!", said the sheik. Finally, he asked the last man,"And you, what do you do for a living?" And the third man answered, with a sly grin, "I'm a lollipop salesman!"

There was a businesswoman who just made a million dollars for an Arabian Oil Sheik. When she was leaving the Oil Sheik offered her Diamonds and rubies and a Silver-plated Rolls Royce, but she declined.The Sheik insisted so she said that she just started to golf and maybe a set of golf clubs would be nice.A few weeks later she received a telegram from the sheik."So far I have bought you 3 golf clubs. I hope you aren't disappointed that only 2 of them have swimming pools."