Amsterdam (AP/UPI) - While the Lewinsky scandal continues to rage on the front of American newspapers, a much different reaction has developed on this side of the Atlantic. To world-wise, sophisticated Europeans, the spectacle is a curious sideshow and another reason to mock and disdain the puritan morals of their American counterparts.
"You feelthy Americans, you make me seek," says sneering French graduate student Serge Tati, 47, expressing a common sentiment. Fashionably clad in a horizontal stripe t-shirt and skin-tight Speedo, he was recently relaxing on the Lido with his mistress Yvette LaFleur, 43. Like thousands of fellow French graduate students, he was enjoying his annual 28-week vacation.
"Beel Clinton, he is Euro, no. He eez moderne, he eez now. He has joie de vivre. He ravages zee young geerls. In my country, we geeve heem a medal, no?" asks Tati, deeply drawing on a clove cigarette.
"Oui, like Jerry Lewees," adds the topless more...
I'm surprised that nobody has posted any jokes regarding this scandal yet.
For anybody overseas, or living in a cave, this woman Heidi ran a brothel that catered to Hollywood's biggest stars, movie executives, and (allegedly) professional sports players.
She got caught, and the whole affair has Hollywood buzzing. There are rumors that the judge is going to subpoena her black book, which contains all of her customers. The press has nicknamed her the "Madam of the stars."
Because of her sudden fame, she is selling interviews, pictures, etc. (She is a prostitute after all...) I heard these prices on the radio this morning.
The movie rights to her life story, including the scandal, will be sold for $1 million dollars. (This is a very high price for movie rights, but many of the top movie executives will willingly pay more for the story, to make sure that they are NOT portrayed in the movie!)
A picture of the COVER of her black book, listing her clients, sells more...
Since this most recent sex scandal broke on President Clinton, most democrats are scrambling to defend him. One of the more popular ones around seems to be: "Kennedy did the same thing".
Well... maybe, but not only did Kennedy have class and discretion, he had much better taste in women.
The US Army is currently in the midst of a sexual harassment scandal. It started at a small base in Aberdeen, Maryland. These are some things you might either see in the news, or hear about:
As a result of an internal investigation, one of the Duty Officer's stunning, blonde staffers was transferred from Aberdeen Maryland to an obscure base in Utah. The woman reported to her new Commanding Officer and handed him her orders. He glanced at them and said, "Well Private, your duties here will be pretty much the same as your last assignment." The girl sighed and said, "Yes Sir. I kind-of figured that. Will be be OK if I drape my uniform over this chair?"
Then there was the newly promoted Army Captain who promptly had his female Quartermaster on the carpet because she forgot to include a sofa in his office.
"I'm telling you Jody, I've never been happier" said the one recruit to the other. I have two Drill Sergeants madly in love with me. One is just more...
This joke could be offensive to Norwegians, but I can assure you it's not.
Any Norwegian reader would just tell an even better joke about a Swede instead.
Read in a book about the Joke-war between Norway and Sweden.
It's mid December some year, and Norway has had a new ambassador in the USA
for about a month. He is, as a matter of fact not only new as ambassador
to the USA, he is a novice ambassador of any sort.
He is just about getting familiar with his
work, but he's not always sure about what to do. Suddenly the phone rings..
- Yees... he says, a bit confused. (His phone hardly ever rings.)
- Good morning Mr Ambassador. This is Mike Giordano from the New York Times.
I'd like to know what you want for a Christmas present.
- Eh, Sveind (Yes, that's his name) said. Christmas present... Eh...
I'm very sory Mike, I can't accept any gifts, but tanks anyway.
- Yes, of course... I understand, said Mike with a voice telling a deaf more...