Sally Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Lucid Moment

    Hot 1 year ago

    No one believes seniors. . . everyone thinks they are senile.
    They were celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired.
    Holding hands they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they'd shared, where Andy had carved "I love you, Sally."
    On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armored car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up, but not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money--and it's fifty-thousand dollars.
    Andy said, "We've got to give it back."
    Sally said, "Finders keepers." She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic.
    The next day, two FBI men were canvassing the neighborhood looking for the money, and knock on the door. "Pardon me, but did either of you find a bag that fell out more...

    Texas Chili Contest

    Hot 2 years ago

    Notes from an inexperienced chili tester named Frank, who was visiting Texas from the east coast:
    Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The regular judge called in sick at the last minute and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the two other judges (native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy, and besides, they told me I could have all the free beer I wanted during the chili tasting, so I accepted.
    Here are the scorecards from the event:
    CHILI #1: MIKE'S MANIAC MOBSTER MONSTER CHILI
    Judge #1: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.
    Judge #2: Nice, smooth flavor. Very mild.
    Frank: Holy shit, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me 3 beers to put the flames out. I hope this is the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
    CHILI #2: ARTHUR'S AFTERBURNER CHILI
    Judge #1: Smoky, with more...

    The blonde and sally

    Hot 1 year ago

    one day sally was jumping on railroad tracks saying 21, 21, 21 then she sees a blonde and asks if she wants to jump with her and the blonde said sure so they are jumping and saying 21, 21, 21 and a train starts to come and sally jumps off and the blonde continues to jump the train kills her and then sally gets up and starts jumping again an is saying 22, 22, 22.
    by Stephen R.

    Forgetfulness

    Hot 1 year ago

    [Not good reading, but good for a group]
    An older lady gets undressed and starts to get into the bathtub. She
    gets about halfway into the tub and thinks, ''Was I getting into the
    tub or getting out?'' She calls out, ''Bernice! Was I getting
    into the bathtub or getting out?''
    Bernice says, ''Well I don't know. I'll have to come up and look.''
    Bernice starts walking up the stairs to the bathroom, gets halfway
    up and thinks to herself, ''Was I going up the stairs or down?'' She
    calls out ''Sally! Was I going up or down the stairs?''
    Sally, down in the living room calls back, ''How should I know?'' and
    thinks to herself, ''I'm glad I'm not losing my mind like the other people
    in this house.''
    So Sally starts...
    Do you remember the punchline to this joke?

    Senile

    Hot 1 week ago

    An elderly couple were celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired.
    Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they'd shared, where Andy had carved, "I love you, Sally."
    On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armored car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up, but not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money. It totaled fifty thousand dollars.
    Andy said, "We've got to give it back." Sally said, "Finders keepers." She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic.
    The next day two FBI men were canvassing the neighborhood looking for the money, and knock on the door. "Pardon me, but did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armored car yesterday?"
    Sally said, more...

  • Recent Activity