Polish Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Polak Detective

    Hot 2 years ago

    Three men were all applying for the same job as a detective. One was Polish, one was Jewish, and one was Italian. Rather than ask the standard questions during the interview, the chief decided to ask each applicant just one question and base his decision upon that answer.
    When the Jewish man arrived for his interview, the chief asked, "Who killed Jesus Christ?"
    The Jewish man answered without hesitation "The Romans killed him." The chief thanked him and he left.
    When the Italian man arrived for his interview, the chief asked the same question. He replied "Jesus was killed by the Jews." Again, the chief thanked the man who then left.
    When the Polish man arrived for his interview, he was asked the exact same question. He thought for a long time, before saying, "Could I have some time to think about it?" The chief said, "OK, but get back to me tommorrow."
    When the Polish man arrived home, his wife asked "How did more...

    A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer and says to the bartender, "Hey, I got this great Polish Joke..." The barkeep glares at him and says in a warning tone of voice: "Before you go telling that joke you better know that I'm Polish, both bouncers are Polish and so are most of my customers" "Okay" says the customer,"I'll tell it very slowly."

    Sleeping In The Barn

    Hot 1 year ago

    Three men are driving in a car when it breaks down on an abandoned road: A Hindu man, a Jewish man, and a Polish man. After walking for a few miles, they come across a farm with a barn. Desperately seeking a place to sleep for the night, they knock on the door and ask the farmer if they can sleep in the barn.
    The farmer says it's OK as long as they don't disturb his sleep or the animals, so the three men go to sleep in the barn with all the animals.
    Fifteen minutes later, the Hindu man bangs on the farmer's door and asks if he can sleep on the floor of his room, because he cannot sleep with sacred cows next to him. The farmer says it's OK and lets him in.
    In another fifteen minutes, the Jewish man bangs on the farmer's door and asks if he can sleep on the floor of his room, because he cannot sleep with pigs next to him, and the farmer says this is OK. Now only the Polish man is outside.
    Fifteen minutes later, the farmer hears another knock on the door, and by this time more...

    On the first day of Christmas, My drive through gave to me: A Big Bacon Classic with cheese. On the second day of Christmas, My drive through gave to me: Two Happy Meals, and a Big Bacon Classic with cheese. On the third day of Christmas, My drive through gave to me: Three Biggie Fries, Two Happy Meals, And a Big Bacon Classic with cheese. On the fourth day of Christmas, My drive through gave to me: Four Egg McMuffins, Three Biggie Fries, Two Happy Meals, And a Big Bacon Classic with cheese. On the fifth day of Christmas, My drive through gave to me: Five onion rings, Four Egg McMuffins, Three Biggie Fries, Two Happy Meals, And a Big Bacon Classic with cheese. On the sixth day of Christmas, My drive through gave to me: Six chocolate milkshakes, Five onion rings, Four Egg McMuffins, Three Biggie Fries, Two Happy Meals, And a Big Bacon Classic with cheese. On the seventh day of Christmas, My drive through gave to me: Seven pints of cole slaw, Six chocolate milkshakes, Five onion rings, more...

    Funny Riddle

    Hot 6 years ago

    Two Polish guys are sitting on a park bench, and a bum comes up to them.
    "Hey!!" he bellows, in his hoarse voice. "I got a riddle for you two. What has 2 heads, 4 arms, 4 legs, and stinks like SHIT??"
    The Polish guys look at each other, and one of them shrugs, "I give up, what has 2 heads, 4 arms, 4 legs, and stinks like SHIT??"
    "You and your friend!!" the bum staggers away chuckling.
    The Polish guys look at each other and start laughing. "That was a funny riddle that bum told us", they say, "let's go do it on someone."
    Laughing almost hysterically, they see two American guys. They come up to them and smile.
    "Hey guys!" they laugh. "We got a riddle for you! What has 2 heads, 4 arms, 4 legs, and stinks like SHIT?"
    The American guys shrug, waiting for the answer.
    The Polish guys chuckle again, and one of them says as he smirks, "Me and my friend!!!"

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