Polak Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Polak With Chainsaw

    Hot 8 months ago

    A Polak is looking to buy a saw to cut down some trees in his back yard. He goes to a chainsaw shop and asks about various chainsaws.
    The dealer tells him, "Look, I have a lot of models, but why don't you save yourself a lot of time and aggrevation and get the top-of-the-line model. This chainsaw will cut a hundred cords of wood for you in one day."
    So the Polak takes the chainsaw home and begins working on the trees. After cutting for several hours and only cutting two cords, he decides to quit. He thinks there is something wrong with the chainsaw. "How can I cut for hours and only cut two cords?", the Polak asks himself. "I will begin first thing in the morning and cut all day", the Polak tells himself.
    So, the next morning the Polak gets up at 4 in the morning and cuts, and cuts, and cuts till nightfall, and he only manages to cut five cords.
    The Polak is convinced this is a bad saw. "The dealer told me it would cut one hundred more...

    Polak Joins Baseball Team

    Hot 8 months ago

    A Polak wanted to join an amateur baseball team. The coach looked him over and decided to give him a chance.
    "I will give you three questions," said the coach. "If you come back in a week and answer them all correctly, you're on the team."
    "Fair enough!" said the Polak eagerly.
    The coach proceeded, "Here are your questions. First, how many days are there in a week that start with the letter 'T'? Second, how many seconds are there in a year? And third, how many d's are there in 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?'"
    Next week, the Polak came back, feeling all confident that he knew the right answers. So again the coach said, "So how many days in the week that start with 'T'?"
    The Polak said, "Two!"
    "Very good!" said the coach. And what are they?"
    "Today and Tomorrow!"
    "Hmm... OK," said the coach.
    "How many seconds are there in a more...

    Polak: Build Me A Box

    Hot 4 months ago

    A Polak went to a carpenter and said, "Can you build me a box that
    is two inches high, two inches wide, and fifty feet long?"
    "Hmm..." mused the carpenter. "It could be done, I suppose, but what
    would you want a box like that for?"
    "Well, you see," said the Polak, "my neighbor moved away and forgot
    some things, so he asked me to send him his garden hose."

    A 12-year-old boy comes up to the Polak and says, "I was looking in your bedroom window last night and I saw your wife giving you a blow job. Nyah, nyah, nyah."The Polak answers, "The joke's on you, Johnny. Nyah, nyah, nyah-I wasn't even home last night!"

    A Polak is looking to buy a saw to cut down some trees in his back yard. He goes to a chainsaw shop and asks about various chainsaws.The dealer tells him, "Look, I have a lot of models, but why don't you save yourself a lot of time and aggrevation and get the top-of-the-line model. This chainsaw will cut a hundred cords of wood for you in one day."So the Polak takes the chainsaw home and begins working on the trees. After cutting for several hours and only cutting two cords, he decides to quit. He thinks there is something wrong with the chainsaw. "How can I cut for hours and only cut two cords?", the Polak asks himself. "I will begin first thing in the morning and cut all day", the Polak tells himself.So, the next morning the Polak gets up at 4 in the morning and cuts, and cuts, and cuts till nightfall, and he only manages to cut five cords.The Polak is convinced this is a bad saw. "The dealer told me it would cut one hundred cords of wood in a day, more...

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