Pointer Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Never write a line of code that someone else can understand.
    Make the simplest line of code appear complex. Use long
    counter intuitive names. Don't ever code "a=b", rather do something
    like:
    AlphaNodeSemaphore=*(int)(&(unsigned long)(BetaFrameNodeFarm));
    Type fast, think slow.
    Never use direct references to anything ever. Bury everything in
    macros. Bury the macros in include files. Reference those include
    files indirectly from other include files. Use macros to reference
    those include files.
    Never include a comment that will help someone else understand your
    code. If they understand it, they don't need you.
    Never generate new sources. Always ifdef the old ones. Every binary
    in the world should be generated from the same sources.
    Never archive all the sources necessary to build a binary. Always
    hide on your own disk. If they can build your binary, they don't
    need you.
    Never code a function to return a value. more...

    For all you dog lovers out there, here are some of the lessor known breeds that are being bred in different parts of the United States,
    Crossbeed Dogs:
    Pointer + Setter = Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet
    Kerry Blue Terrier + Skye Terrier = Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries
    Great Pyrenees + Dachshund = Pyradachs, a puzzling breed
    Pekingnese + Lhasa Apso = Peekasso, an abstract dog
    Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel = Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle
    Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever = Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists
    Newfoundland + Basset Hound = Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors
    Terrier + Bulldog = Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes
    Bloodhound + Labrador = Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly
    Malamute + Pointer = Moot Point, owned by....oh, well, it doesn't matter anyway
    Collie + Malamute = Commute, a dog that travels to work
    Deerhound + more...

    Pointer + Setter = Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet.
    Kerry Blue Terrier + Skye Terrier = Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries.
    Great Pyrenees + Dachshund = Pyradachs, a puzzling breed.
    Pekinese + Lhasa Apso = Peekasso, an abstract dog.
    Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel = Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle.
    Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever = Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists everywhere.
    Newfoundland + Basset Hound = Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors.
    Terrier + Bulldog = Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes.
    Malamute + Pointer = Moot Point, a dog that....oh, well, it doesn't matter anyway.
    Collie + Malamute = Commute, a dog that travels to work.
    Deerhound + Terrier = Derriere, a dog that's true to the end.
    Bull Terrier + Shih Tzu = Bullshitz, a gregarious but unreliable breed.

    On the first day of Christmas, technology gave to me
    A database with a broken b-tree (what the hell is a b-tree anyway?)
    On the second day of Christmas, technology gave to me
    Two transceiver failures (CRC errors? Collisions? What is going on?)
    And a database with a broken b-tree (Rebuild WHAT? It's a 10GB database!)
    On the third day of Christmas, technology gave to me
    Three French users (who, of course, think they know everything)
    Two transceiver failures (which are now spewing packets all over the net)
    And a database with a broken b-tree (Backup? What backup?)
    On the fourth day of Christmas, technology gave to me
    Four calls for support (playing the same Christmas song over and over)
    Three French users (Why do they like to argue so much over trivial things?)
    Two transceiver failures (How the hell do I know which ones they are?)
    And a database with a broken b-tree (Pointer error? What's a pointer error?)
    On the fifth more...

    The following breeds are now recognized by the AKC:

    Collie + Lhasa Apso
    Collapso, a dog that folds up for easy transport

    Spitz + Chow Chow
    Spitz-Chow, a dog that throws up a lot

    Pointer + Setter
    Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet

    Great Pyrenees + Dachshund
    Pyradachs, a puzzling breed

    Pekingnese + Lhasa Apso
    Peekasso, an abstract dog

    Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel
    Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle

    Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever
    Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists

    Newfoundland + Basset Hound
    Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors

    Terrier + Bulldog
    Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes

    Bloodhound + Labrador
    Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly

    Malamute + Pointer
    Moot Point, owned by....oh, well, it doesn't matter more...

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