Pleased Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth" even when you don't know anything.
    The boy decides to go home and try it out. As he is greeted by his mother at the front door he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father."
    Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother."
    Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth."
    The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug!"

    A gorilla was walking thru' a jungle when he came across a deer eating grasses in a clearing. The gorilla roared, 'Who's the king of the jungle?', and the deer replied, 'Oh, you are, Master.'
    The gorilla walked off pleased. Soon he came across a zebra drinking at a water hole. Again, he roared,'Who's the king of the jungle?', of course, the zebra replied, 'You are, master.'
    The gorilla walked of pleased. Then he came across an elephant. 'Who's the king of the jungle?', he roared again, at the elephant. With that, the elephant threw the gorilla across a tree and jumped on him.
    The gorilla scraped himself up off the ground and said, 'Ok, ok, there's no need to get mad just because you don't know the answer!'

    A boy's classmate told him that most adults are hiding at least one deep, dark secret which makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying "I know the whole truth", even when you don't know anything.
    Thinking this sounded like a pretty good way to make some money, the boy decided to try it out.
    When he got home from school that day, his mother greeted him at the door. He gave her a very serious look and said, "I know the whole truth!" His mother quickly handed him $20 and said, "Don't tell your father."
    Pleased that what his friend said seemed to be working, he waited for his father to get home from work, greeted him and said, "I know the whole truth!" His father immediately handed him $40 and said, "Not a word to your mother."
    Even more pleased with the results of his get-rich-quick scheme, the boy saw the mailman at his front door as he was heading out to school the following day. He looked the mailman in the eye and more...

    A gorilla was walking thru' a jungle when he came across a deer eating grasses in a clearing. The gorilla roared, 'Who's the king of the jungle?', and the deer replied, 'Oh, you are, Master.'The gorilla walked off pleased. Soon he came across a zebra drinking at a water hole. Again, he roared,'Who's the king of the jungle?', of course, the zebra replied, 'You are, master.'The gorilla walked of pleased. Then he came across an elephant. 'Who's the king of the jungle?', he roared again, at the elephant. With that, the elephant threw the gorilla across a tree and jumped on him.The gorilla scraped himself up off the ground and said, 'Ok, ok, there's no need to get mad just because you don't know the answer!'

    Santa got a part time job at the Chandigarh Post Office. The first assignment his supervisor gave him was the job of sorting the mail.
    Santa separated the letters so fast that his motions were literally a blur. Extremely pleased by this, the supervisor approached Santa at the end of his first day.
    "I just want you to know," the supervisor said, "that I'm very pleased with the job you did today. You're one of the fastest workers we've ever had."
    "Thank you, Sir" said Santa, beaming, "and tomorrow I'll try to do even better."
    "Better?" the supervisor asked with astonishment. "How can you possibly do any better than you did today?"
    Santa replied, "Tomorrow I'm going to read the addresses."

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