Planets Jokes

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night, Holmes wakes Watson up: "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce."Watson says, "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."Holmes replied: "Watson, you idiot, somebody stole our tent."

If we find life on other planets, what would happen to the Miss Universe pageant?

A group of astronomers gathered in Prague (calm down ladies) and stripped Pluto of its planetary status. The instellar badasses declared that Pluto no longer met the new criteria to be called a planet. Suck on that Pluto, you ain't never gonna be a celestial body that is in orbit around the sun, and has sufficient mass for its self-gravity to overcome rigid body forces so that it assumes a nearly round shape, bitch! You ain't nothing but an asteroid lovin' punk!
This now reduces the number of planets from 9 to 8. In other news, I want my 7th grade astronomy test to be regraded. I believe, Mr. Dartwell, you will find my answer on how many planets in the solar system to be correct.

A Press Release -
WASHINGTON D.C. The House Appropriations subcommittee on NASA oversight, in another effort to reduce the NASA budget, passed a resolution today to downsize the solar system. According to an unnamed congressional staffer, House Republicans felt there has been "too much redundancy in the solar system" and that streamlining the 4.5 billion year old planetary system is long overdue. Such action would give NASA fewer places to go and this would allow the agency to carry out its space exploration goals within the funding profile that the House proposed earlier this summer.
"Look, we have three terrestrial planets" said Congressman Rip U. Apart (R, Del.), "and only one of them really works! So why not get rid of the other two and clean up the neighborhood?" Most subcommittee members felt that while downsizing was definitely in the cards, eliminating both Mars and Venus was going too far. "We have too many international commitments more...