Pillsbury Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A woman named Linda went to Arkansas last week to visit her in-laws, and while there, went to a store. She parked next to a car with a woman sitting in it, her eyes closed and hands behind her head, apparently sleeping.
    When Linda came out a while later, she again saw the woman, her hands still behind her head but with her eyes open. The woman looked very strange, so Linda tapped on the window and said "Are you okay?"
    The woman answered "I've been shot in the head, and I am holding my brains in."
    Linda didn't know what to do; so she ran into the store where store officials called the paramedics. They had to break into the car because the door was locked.
    When they got in, they found that the woman had bread dough on the back of her head and in her hands. A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded, apparently from the heat in the car, making a loud explosion like that of a gunshot, and hit her in the head.
    When she reached back to find what it more...

    Dear Friend,
    It is with the saddest heart that I pass on the following news. Please join me in remembering a great icon - the veteran Pillsbury Spokesman. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
    Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies and Captain Crunch. The gravesite was piled high with flours.
    Long time friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very "smart" cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions. Toward the end it more...

    Dear Friend, It is with the saddest heart that I pass on the following news. Please join me in remembering a great icon - the veteran Pillsbury Spokesman. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies and Captain Crunch. The gravesite was piled high with flours. Long time friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very "smart" cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions. Toward the end it was thought he more...

    Did you hear that the Pillsbury dough boy died?
    Yup: got a yeast infection.
    Dr.McCoy reported to Captain Kirk: "He's bread, Jim." It was a sad thing that but for a little dough some crusty old doctor could have performed a BATTERy of tests and maybe given him much kneaded treatment. If it worked, the poor soul would still be leaven.

    It is with the saddest heart i pass on the following:Please join me in remembering a great icon - the veteran Pillbury spokesman. The Pillsbury doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
    Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. butterworth, Hungry Jack, The California Raisins, Betty Crocker, The Hostess twinkies,
    and Captain Crunch.
    The gravesite was piled high with flours.As long-time friend, Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
    Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very "smart" cookie, wasting much of his dough on halfbaked schemes. Despite being being a little flaky at times, he even still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millons.
    Toward the end it was more...

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