Physics Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Physics Puzzle...

    Hot 3 months ago

    Physics Puzzle... Nice one - try to crack it. ....
    Once there was a bus conductor, who was very rude to his passengers. One day a beautiful young girl, of around 18 years, tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus.
    Unfortunately the beautiful young girl came under the bus and died on the spot. Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station, who in turn took him to the court.
    The judge was not at all impressed with him and gave him capital punishment. He was taken to the electrocution chamber. There was a single chair in the center of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the room. The conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him. But to everyone's amazement, he survived.
    The judge decided to set him free, and the conductor returned to his profession. After a few months, this time, a good looking middle aged woman tried to board the bus but the conductor didn't stop the bus. Unfortunately, this time more...

    Pre-med Student

    Hot 3 months ago

    As a pre-med student at Washington University in St. Louis, I had to take a difficult class in physics. One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this stuff?" "To save lives." The professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted. "It usually keeps the idiots like you out of medical school," replied the professor.

    Physics Exam

    Hot 3 months ago

    Story of a Physics student who got the following question in an exam:

    "You are given an accurate barometer, how would you use it to determine the height of a skyscraper? "

    He answered: "Go to the top floor, tie a long piece of string to the barometer, let it down' till it touches the ground and measure the length of the string".

    The examiner wasn't satisfied, so they decided to interview the guy:

    "Can you give us another method, one which demonstrates your knowledge of Physics? "

    "Sure, go to the top floor, drop the barometer off, and measure how long before it hits the ground......"

    "Not, quite what we wanted, care to try again? "

    "Make a pendulum of the barometer, measure its period at the bottom, then measure its period at the top......"

    "..another try? ...."

    "Measure the length of the barometer, then mount it more...

    Dr. Schlambaugh, a senior lecturer at the Chemical Engineering Department,University of Oklahoma, is known for posing questions on final exams like: "Why do airplanes fly?" In May a few years ago, the "Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer " exam paper contained the question: "Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof." Most students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or similar. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we must postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it does not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some religions say that if you
    are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. more...

    Before I came to college I wish I had known...
    that it didn't matter how late I scheduled my first class I'd sleep right through it.
    that I would change so much and barely realize it.
    that you can love a lot of people in a lot of different ways.
    that college kids throw airplanes, too.
    that if you wear polyester everyone will ask you why you're so dressed up.
    that every clock on campus shows a different time.
    that if you were smart in high school - so what?
    that I would go to a party the night before a final.
    that chem labs require more time than all my other classes put together.
    that you can know everything and fail a test.
    that you can know nothing and ace a test.
    that I could get used to almost anything I found out about my roomie.
    that home is a great place to visit.
    that most of my education would be obtained outside my classes.
    that friendship is more than getting drunk together.
    that I would be one of those people more...

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