Physically Jokes

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    Jonah's Fate

    Hot 2 years ago

    A little girl spoke to her teacher about whales.
    The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it is a very large mammal, its throat is very small.
    The little girl said, "But how can that be? Jonah was swallowed by a whale."
    Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human. "It is physically impossible!" she said.
    Undaunted, the little girl said, "Well, when I get to heaven I will ask Jonah."
    To this, the teacher said, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
    The little girl replied, "Then YOU ask him!"

    70-year-old George went for his annual physical. All of his tests came back with normal results. Dr. Smith said, "George, everything looks great physically. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with yourself, and do you have a good relationship with your God?" George replied, "Godand me are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so that when I getup in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom (poof!) the light goes on when I pee, and then (poof!) the light goes off when I'm done." "Wow," commentedDr. Smith, "that's incredible!" A little later in the dayDr. Smith called George's wife. "Thelma," he said, "George is just fine. Physically he's great. But I had to call because I'm in awe of hisrelationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and (poof!) thelight goes on in the bathroom, and then (poof!) the light goes off?" Thelma exclaimed,"That old fool! He's more...

    77 year old Morris went for his annual physical. All of his tests came back with great results. Dr. Cohen said, "Morris everything looks great physically. How are you doing mentally, emotionally and are you at peace with yourself, and have a good relationship with God?"
    Morris replied, "God and me are tight. We are so close that when I get up in the middle of the night, *poof*... the light goes on when I go to the bathroom and then *poof* the light goes off!"
    "Wow," commented Dr. Cohen, "That's incredible!"
    A little later in the day Dr. Cohen called Morris's wife. "Becky," he said, "Morris is just fine. Physically he's great. But I had to call because I'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and *poof* the light goes on in the bathroom and then *poof* the light goes off?"
    Becky replied, "The darn fool!... He's peeing in the fridge again!"

    Santa went for his annual physical check up. All of his tests came back with normal results.
    His Dr. said, "Santa, everything looks great physically. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with yourself, and do you have a good relationship with your God?"
    Santa replied, "God and me are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so that when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, poof! the light goes on when I pee, and then poof! the light goes off when I'm done."
    "Wow," commented Dr., "That's incredible!"
    A little later in the day Dr. called Jeeto, Santa's wife and says, "Santa is just fine. Physically he's great. But I had to call because I'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and poof! the light goes on in the bathroom and then poof! the light goes off?"
    Jeeto exclaimed, "Oh God !! He's peeing in the more...

    Seventy year old George went for his annual physical. All of his tests came back with great results. Dr. Smith said, "George everything looks great physically. How are you doing mentally, emotionally and are you at peace with your self and have a good relationship with God?"George replied, "God and me are tight. We are so close that when I get upin the middle of the night, poof!...the light goes on and I go to thebathroom and then poof! the light goes off!""Wow," commented Dr. Smith, 'That's incredible!"A little later in the day Dr. Smith called George's wife. "Thelma," he said, "George is just fine. Physically he's great. But I had to call youbecause I'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and poof! The light goes on in the bathroom and then poof! The light goes off?"Thelma replied, "Oh God! He's peeing in the fridge again!"

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