Outfit Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A drunk walked into a tavern, sat down at the bar. He placed a small cardboard box on the bar, and ordered a beer. When the beer came, he opened the box, pulled out a tiny piano and bench and set them on the bar, then ordered another beer. When the beer came, he reached into the box, pulled out a frog, sat him on the piano bench and said, "PLAY". The frog immediately began to play the piano. It played all the favorites, and some classical and then launched into contemporary jazz. The man ordered another beer, and when it came he reached into the cardboard box and pulled out a little white mouse. He set this mouse on top of the piano and said "SING". The frog began to play the piano and the mouse began to sing, first some 'oldies but goodies', then all of the current favorites.A man at the bar who was watching all of this approached the drunk man and offered to buy this little outfit that he had. After a bit of negotiating, the drunk man agreed to sell it to the man more...

    A Texan went to Chicago and thought he would buy a new "city" outfit.
    He went into Marshall Fields and when asked by a sweet young woman if
    she could help him, he answered,
    "Yes ma'am. Ya' see, I'm from Texas and I want to buy a complete city
    outfit."
    Her eyes lit up as she asked, "Where would you like to start?"
    "Well, ma'am, how about a suit?"
    "Yes, sir. What size?"
    "Size 53 tall, ma'am."
    "Wow, that's really big."
    "Yes, ma'am, they really grow them big in Texas."
    "What's next?" she asked.
    He replied, "How about some shoes?"
    "What size?"
    "Size 15 double E."
    "Wow, that's really big!
    "Yes, ma'am. They really grow them big in Texas."
    "What's next?"
    "Well, I reckon I'll need a shirt."
    "Yes, sir. What size?"
    "Nineteen and a half neck, sleeves more...

    Oneday a Big woman in a yellow outfit went to the bording part of a airport. She bent down to tie her shoes and 5 people piled in because the thought she was a taxi.

    I like your outfit. It would look good on my floor

    A drunk walked into a tavern, sat down at the bar. He placed a small cardboard box on the bar, and ordered a beer. When the beer came, he opened the box, pulled out a tiny piano and bench and set them on the bar, then ordered another beer. When the beer came, he reached into the box, pulled out a frog, sat him on the piano bench and said, "PLAY". The frog immediately began to play the piano. It played all the favorites, and some classical and then launched into contemporary jazz. The man ordered another beer, and when it came he reached into the cardboard box and pulled out a little white mouse. He set this mouse on top of the piano and said "SING". The frog began to play the piano and the mouse began to sing, first some' oldies but goodies', then all of the current favorites. A man at the bar who was watching all of this approached the drunk man and offered to buy this little outfit that he had. After a bit of negotiating, the drunk man agreed to sell it to the more...

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