Oranges Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Question and the Answer given by Candidates, oh sorry they are IAS
    (Indian Administrative Services - THE most difficult examination in
    India . Candidates are graduate Officers now.

    Q. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
    A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper)

    Q. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it
    take four men to build it?
    A. No time at all it is already built. (UPSC 23 rd Rank Opted for IFS)

    Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four
    apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
    A. Very large hands.(Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)

    Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
    A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with
    one hand. (UPSC Rank 14 Opted for IES)

    Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
    A. No Probs, He sleeps at more...

    Policemen

    Hot 8 years ago

    So there was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead and they were running from the police but all they could find was a barn. They were in a hurry to hide so the brunette hid in the horse's stable, the redhead hid in a tree, and the blonde hid behind a few boxes of oranges. When the policemen came to the barn, they went to the horses stable and the policeman heard something.
    "Wait!" he said. "I hear breathing!"
    But the brunette went, "Neigh! Neigh!"
    "Oh, it's just a horse," the policeman said. Then he walked around and came upon a tree and heard breathing.
    "Stop!" he said. "I hear breathing in the tree!"
    "Caww! Caww!" went the redhead.
    "Oh, it's just a bird," said the policeman. Next, the policemen came upon a barn with a stack of boxes of oranges.
    "Wait!" Said the policeman. "I hear breathing!"
    Then the blonde said "I'm an orange! I'm an orange!"

    A man was obsessed with women's breasts, so he went to a psychologist and told him his problem.
    "Let's play a little word association game," the doctor said. "I'll say a word and you say the first thing that comes to your mind."
    "Plums," said the doctor.
    "Breasts," the patient said.
    "Oranges."
    "Breasts," the patient replied.
    "Watermelons."
    "Breasts," said the patient.
    "Wipers."
    "Breasts," the patient said.
    "Wait a minute!" the doctor said. "I can understand the connection between plums, oranges, watermelons and breasts. But, automobile wipers? Where's the connection?"
    "Easy, doc," the patient explained, "one on the left and one on the right!"

    A woman goes into a greengrocer and is looking round anxiously at a pile of
    oranges.
    "Can I help you madam?" asks the shopkeeper.
    "Well, I was looking for some fruit for my husband. Have these oranges been
    treated with any poisonous fertilizer or weedkiller?" she replies.
    "No madam, you'll have to get that from the chemist's."

    Father: If I had ten oranges and gave you two, how many would I have left?
    Son: I don't know, because in school we learn on apples.

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