Operation Jokes

  • Funny Jokes


    Hot 2 weeks ago

    When the surgeon came to see his blonde patient on the day after her operation, she asked him somewhat hesitantly just how long it would be before she could resume her sex life.
    "Uh, I hadn't really thought about it," admitted the stunned surgeon. You're the first one ever to ask that after a tonsillectomy.

    A lady says to her doctor, "My husband has been complaining that my vagina has an odor, but I bent over and took a whiff, and I don't smell anything."
    The doctor examines her vagina, and then says, "There's something terribly wrong. You need an operation." She asks, "On my vagina?"
    He says, "No. On your nose!"

    CAT User's Manual

    Hot 4 years ago

    CAT v.6.1b: Completely Autonomous Tester, Manufactured by MOMCAT
    User Installation and Maintenance Documentation:
    User Friendly
    Low Power CPU
    Self Portable Operation
    Dual Video and Audio Input
    Audio Output
    Auto Search Capability for Input Data
    Auto Search for Output Bin
    Auto Learn Program in ROM
    Instant Transition To Energy Saving Standby Mode When Not In Use
    Wide Operating Temperature Range
    Mouse Driven
    Self Cleaning
    Production Details:
    After basic KIT construction, the unit undergoes six weeks of
    onsite ROM programming and burn-in testing. Listed features are
    installed during this period. Since MOMCAT uses local suppliers,
    there may be a variation between individual units. Some of the
    units may not meet general standards. MOMCAT's quality assurance
    may reject inferior units. Users may sometimes salvage rejected
    units. Beware of Far East clones. These may violate more...

    The Operation

    Hot 3 years ago

    A young lady is in the hospital for an operation.
    She says, "Doc, how long after my operation will I have to wait until I can have sex again?"
    He says, "You know, Miss Stukowski, you're the first person who ever asked me that before a tonsillectomy!"

    A man visits his doctor. "I think I have a problem, doc," said the patient. "One of my testicles has turned blue."
    The doctor examined the man briefly and concluded the patient would die if they didn't have his testicle removed.
    "Are you crazy?!" exclaimed the patient, "How could I let you do such a thing to me?"
    "Do you want to die?", asked the doctor rhetorically, and the patient had to agree to have his testicle removed. But two weeks after the operation, he came back.
    "Doc, I don't know how to say this, but the other testicle has turned blue too."
    Again, the doctor told him that if he wants to live, his other testicle must be cut off too. And again, the man was very reluctant.
    "Hey, do you want to die?", asked the doc, and the patient had to agree to the operation.
    But, about two weeks after he is testicleless, he returned to the doctor. "I think something is very wrong with me. more...

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