Oil Jokes / Recent Jokes

Golf Clubs

Hot 3 years ago

There was a businesswoman who just made a million dollars for an Arabian Oil Sheik. When she was leaving the Oil Sheik offered her Diamonds and rubies and a Silver-plated Rolls Royce, but she declined.

The Sheik insisted so she said that she just started to golf and maybe a set of golf clubs would be nice.

A few weeks later she received a telegram from the sheik.

So far I have bought you 3 golf clubs. I hope you aren't disappointed that only 2 of them have swimming pools."

Golf Clubs

Hot 3 years ago

There was a businesswoman who just made a million dollars for an Arabian Oil Sheik. When she was leaving the Oil Sheik offered her Diamonds and rubies and a Silver-plated Rolls Royce, but she declined. The Sheik insisted so she said that she just started to golf and maybe a set of golf clubs would be nice. A few weeks later she received a telegram from the sheik. “So far I have bought you 3 golf clubs. I hope you aren't disappointed that only 2 of them have swimming pools."

If Olive oil comes from

Hot 7 years ago

If Olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

Scientists are excited about the real possibility of using corn as a means to create fuel, thus significantly reducing our dependency on oil.
I understand George Bush will be deploying troops to Iowa next week for Operation Shuck.

Saudi Arabian Prince Bandar bin Sultan bin Abdul Aziz is selling his lavish Aspen ranch-asking price-$135 million.
In a statement made through his real-estate agent, overly perky Gail Stevens-a statement that could barely be heard over her Century 21 jacket, "Bandar is selling because he's spending too much time in Saudi Arabia, furiously masturbating to the astronomical price of oil."

Gas prices continue to pinch U.S. drivers. Living in New York, I get to save that expense and take mass transit, although I do spend $300 a month on pepper spray. The good news is that I'm getting 40 miles per gallon of pepper spray.

In the wake of a $10.36 billion quarterly profit report by Exxon-Mobil, industry analysts said that over the long run, oil is actually "less profitable than several other sectors." Technically, that's only true when George W. Bush is running the company.