Nith Jokes / Recent Jokes

Lisping Dwarf
A dwarf with a lisp goes to an agricultural show to buy a mare. He wanders around until he comes across a beautiful mare inside a small enclosure with a farmer standing at the gate. He goes up to the farmer and says,
"Excthuth me, can I have a look at your horth?"
"Sure", says the farmer, "come on in."
The dwarf wanders round and round the mare and then stops, says to the farmer "Her eyeth, her eyeth, I want to see her eyeth."
The farmer has to bend down and pick up the dwarf to show him the mare's eyes.
"Nith eyeth, nith eyeth, I like thith horth, I like thith horth, I think I want to buy thith horth." Once again the dwarf wanders around the horse, in turn asking the farmer to pick him up and show him the mare's ears and exclaiming, "Nith earth, nith earth, I like thith horth, I like thith horth, I think I want to buy thith horth."
The farmer is starting to get pissed off by this more...

A guy who owns a horse farm gets a call from one of his buddies. "I know this midget with a speech impediment who's looking to buy a horse, so I'm sending him right over."
The midget arrives and the owner asks him if he's interested in a male or female horse.
"A female horth," replies the midget, so the owner shows him one.
"Nith looking horth. Can I thee her mouf?" the midget asks. The owner lifts the midget up and shows him the horse's mouth.
"Nith mouf," says the midget. "Can I thee her eyeth?" So the owner lifts the midget up and shows him the horse's eyes.
"OK, what about her earth?" the midget asks. Now the owner is beginning to get a little pissed, but he picks up the midget once more and shows him her ears.
"OK, finally, I'd like to thee her twat," says the midget.
Losing all patience, the owner picks up the midget and shoves his head up the horse, then pulls him out.
Shaking more...