Newfies Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Two newfies walked into a pet store. The first says "I want four budgies." Salesman-certainly sir, would you like two male and two female or all male or all female? Newfie-I don't care. I just want 4 budgies! Salesman-certainly sir, what color would you like? We have yellow, blue, gr... Newfie - I don't care what color they are, just put four budgies in a box for me. Is that too hard? Salesman - O.K. O.K. The two newfies pay for the budgies and leave. They drive out to this high cliff in Newfoundland and the first newfie reaches in the box and pulls out two of the birds, grasps them firmly and jumps off the cliff while flapping his arms. Of course he SPLATS at the bottom. The second newfie looks down at his friend's twisted remains and says "What a shame. this budgie jumping isn't all it's cracked up to be!"

    Two newfies walked into a pet store. The first says "I want four budgies." Salesman-certainly sir, would you like two male and two female or all male or all female? Newfie-I dont care. I just want 4 budgies! Salesman-certainly sir, what color would you like? We have yellow, blue, gr... Newfie - I dont care what color they are, just put four budgies in a box for me. Is that too hard? Salesman - O. K. O. K. The two newfies pay for the budgies and leave. They drive out to this high cliff in Newfoundland and the first newfie reaches in the box and pulls out two of the birds, grasps them firmly and jumps off the cliff while flapping his arms. Of course he SPLATS at the bottom. The second newfie looks down at his friends twisted remains and says "What a shame. this budgie jumping isnt all its cracked up to be!"

    Q: How many newfies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A: 2 one to hold the light bulb and 1 to spin him round and round.

    Two newfies were hunting moose in the woods. They shot one on the last day of the hunt. They began to haul the moose out of the woods by the tail. They got to the road and started pulling the moose towards their truck. On the way to the truck they came across another hunter. The hunter asked them why they were pulling the moose by the tail. They simply responded, “We don’t know. ” The other hunter told them that they should pull it by the antlers because it was a lot easier.
    The two newfies thanked the man, and began pulling the moose by the antlers. About an hour later, one newfie said to the other, “Bud, this sure is a lot easier pulling it this way, but… why do we keep getting farther and farther away from the truck?? ”

  • Recent Activity