Mower Jokes / Recent Jokes

Why did you drive the lawn mower over your Easter basket? I thought the plastic grass was growing too high!

A preacher was making his rounds to his parishioners on a bicycle, when he came upon little johnny trying to sell a lawn mower. "How much do you want for the mower?" asked the preacher. "I just want enough money to go out and buy me a bicycle", said little johnny. After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked, "Will you take my bike in trade for it?" Little Johnny asked if he could try it out first, and after riding the bike around a little while said, "Mister, you've got yourself a deal." The preacher took the mower and began to try to crank it. He pulled on the string a few times with no response from the mower. The preacher called the little boy over and said, "I can't get this mower to start." Little Johnny said, "That's because you have to curse at it to get it started." The preacher said, "I've been a minister for twenty-five years. I don't even remember how to curse." Little Johnny looked at him happily more...

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, fishing, always something more important to me.
Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house.
I was gone only a few minutes. When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. "When you finish cutting the grass," I said, "you might as well sweep the sidewalk."
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

What's the difference between a lawn mower and a soprano sax?
You can tune a lawn mower, and the neighbors are upset if you borrow a
lawn mower and don't return it.

A new sales assistant was hired at a large department store. On his first day, the sales manager took him around to show him the ropes. They were passing by the gardening section, when they heard a customer asking for grass seed. The sales manager stepped in.

Sales manager: Excuse me, but will you be needing a hose to water your lawn?
Customer: I guess so. I'll take one.
Sales manager: And how about some fertilizer and weed-killer?
Customer: Um, okay.
Sales manager: Here's a couple of bags. You'll also need a lawn mower to cut the grass when it starts growing too long.
Customer: I'll take one of those too.

After the customer left, the sales manager turned to the assistant. "You see?" he said, "that's the way to make a good sale. Always sell more than what the customer originally came in for."

Impressed, the assistant headed off for the pharmaceutical section, where he was to work. Soon, a man strolled more...

What do you call a Mexican without a lawn mower? Unemployed.

The power mower was broken and wouldn't run, a lady kept hinting to her husband that he should get it fixed. But, somehow the message never sank in.Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When her husband
arrived home one day, he found her seated in the tall grass, busily
snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. He watched silently for a short time and then went into the house.He was gone only a few moments when he came out again. He handed her a
toothbrush. "When you finish cutting the grass", he said, "you might as well
sweep the sidewalks".